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1. She says you can't just decide to not be a part of the village. To that I say, she can't just decide your time is hers to use for childcare.

   Look, it's tough raising kids without help. But it isn't anyone's job except the parents of the young child. It's doable. Pay for childcare. Work from home making a bit less to offset daycare costs.

   You are 100% in the right here, and she is wrong for assuming this is going to be your job. I'm mid 40's with 2 teens, and I feel exactly like you do. They have kids, good luck! I'll be a part of their lives of course, but I've raising mine at that point.

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