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With that mentality OP you'll be proving yourself at every turn. Choose yourself, your mental health is at stake. Tell him what he wants to hear, ok you think I cheated, great, go with that story. I'm done here and leave it alone. You know the truth…
People like him always want to find fault. If it's not that, he will say “why did you give him your number, why did you shake hands, why did you look at him” etc etc it won't stop. Also why is he acting his shoe size fighting every guy talking to you? He will get knocked out one day and blame you for that.. smh yeah I'd dip n not put anymore effort into it..
Abuse can happen at any age.
And…even if OP feels too scared to speak up and chooses avoidance instead, that’s still not consent.
My question is, what are you planning to do about your addiction? It sounds to me like you are saying that because you are addicted, you won’t stop and she needs to deal with it. Wrong answer!
Because you are addicted, you NEED to stop. Get professional help, make an actual effort, and read up on how to manage addiction. You’ve acknowledged that you are addicted, but you don’t seem to be acknowledging that it is actually a problem. IT IS A PROBLEM. If you want to salvage your relationship, you need to apologize for lying to her, and demonstrate a willingness to change. Don’t use addiction as an excuse. Use it as a measurement of how serious the situation is and motivation to work on yourself.
You listed all of these faults you have… but still seem to blame HER for the relationship not working. You listed all these things that she has worked on since the break up … but nothing about what you have done to improve since the relationship. Not sure you have a realistic outlook on what you did to contribute to the problem.
Wait, she has a history of doing this to her partners?
Yep
OP, I really don't understand all the comments that treat this as something light. That an adult person bathes 2 times a week is something disgusting. Yes, I understand that there are people who do not have the privilege of having water every day, but that does not mean that they still have shitty hygiene. What's more, probably people who don't have water every day look for ways to improve their hygiene despite it. Your wife has water available and she still chooses to bathe twice a week? That's not right, this has to be your hill to die for.
Is her skin really so sensitive to showering that she has to use a LOT of post bath lotions? Did she really look for a way to shower often and that her skin is not so affected? Did she really look for a way to replace the shower with something else in her daily hygiene or did she just stop showering?
NOBODY likes to be told that they are dirty or that they have a bad smell or that they have poor hygiene, I am sure that the vast majority of us would react badly if someone told us that, but as thinking adults we have the ability to overcome that anger and shame and understand that it is better to be told that you have a bad smell than not to be told anything. In my opinion, the best thing you can do for your wife is to tell her directly that she smells bad and try to find a solution to it. Whether it's bathing more often, cleaning specific areas, etc.
Do you understand how awful this sounds? Please have a little more self respect than this.
How does he even know that this is something that she would be interested in??
Is he a vampire?
Before I give advice, I'd like to confirm something. You say she doesn't argue with you, make you feel guilty, separate you from friends, or manipulate you.
What does she cry about and when? Can you give examples?
“What a rude thing to say”.
no shit sherlock. i’ve dealt with emotionally manipulative people my whole life and creeps aren’t anything new either. thing is they usually think they can get control over you and i am fiercely emotionally and financially dependent, even if i can’t sustain myself i will put myself through immense hardship before entirely relying on another person. i was prepared to live in my car before i was prepared to return home because i don’t want to rely on anyone, not even my own mother. i’m not in lala land, i am aware that this is a risky situation and i’m looking for any signs of it turning dangerous and at that point i’m bailing. this is a long distance relationship and it will stay like that for as long as it needs to
In brief you’re a cheater , and you’ll do it again there’s no way of you will stop it … let the guy go .
If she abuses you like this as your gf what will she be like as your wife? Miserable can't even begin to describe it.