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For anyone who needs to hear this:
MENTAL HEALTH IS NOT AN EXCUSE TO TREAT ANYONE BADLY.
They are not a good, kind person if they're not working on behaviours that hurt and effect you. It doesn't matter how tragic their backstory is. Sure, in some cases, allowances can be made, but that's as long as they're willing to work on their issues and improve it.
I have cPTSD, and a whole bunch of other issues, and that is no reason to be a raging bitch and make my partner feel low, hurt, defeated, disappointed, or guilty. I would despise myself if I did this, and throw myself at my doctor. People need to be held, and hold themselves, accountable.
OP, I have no real advice to give in regards to ending it amicably, other than, no matter what, be safe. If he won't be the one to leave, speak with friends or family who may be able to help you plan/find affordable accommodation. The house you're in isn't as important as you and your mental health is.
I will also add, you are not responsible for preserving his mental health. You are responsible for your own. Just because you had a nicer childhood than he did, doesn't mean you need to bend over backwards or feel guilty. Get what you deserve — which is stability and peace of mind.
For anyone who needs to hear this:
MENTAL HEALTH IS NOT AN EXCUSE TO TREAT ANYONE BADLY.
They are not a good, kind person if they're not working on behaviours that hurt and effect you. It doesn't matter how tragic their backstory is. Sure, in some cases, allowances can be made, but that's as long as they're willing to work on their issues and improve it.
I have cPTSD, and a whole bunch of other issues, and that is no reason to be a raging bitch and make my partner feel low, hurt, defeated, disappointed, or guilty. I would despise myself if I did this, and throw myself at my doctor. People need to be held, and hold themselves, accountable.
OP, I have no real advice to give in regards to ending it amicably, other than, no matter what, be safe. If he won't be the one to leave, speak with friends or family who may be able to help you plan/find affordable accommodation. The house you're in isn't as important as you and your mental health is.
I will also add, you are not responsible for preserving his mental health. You are responsible for your own. Just because you had a nicer childhood than he did, doesn't mean you need to bend over backwards or feel guilty. Get what you deserve — which is stability and peace of mind.