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1. Rumors? Really? With him being in his 50's and you a couple of decades younger than he is, I doubt that his jealousy will change much. I wish you luck.

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2. but then she broke things off with me without warning over text and cut contact with me for 6 months

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   After I got back home I texted N and apologised for the way I acted that night, I didn't expect her to respond since she was likely already asleep

   So, she ignored you all night, but you didn't say anything, then apologized for something she didn't even know (or care) was a problem.

   She broke up without discussion and went NC for six month.

   You are a backup. She didn't want to be alone during the holidays, so got back together with you. Don't be scared that the relationship is over. Be glad you're not in a relationship with someone with whom you are unable to stand up for yourself and feel the need to walk on eggshells for fear of being unceremoniously dumped…again.

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