we don’t have kids, and at this point we aren’t considering it. could you explain how he’s abusive? he isn’t like this all the time, we do have good days. i don’t want to be someone who has blinders on and can’t see it for myself, but that’s how i feel right now. i just need someone to explain it clearly so that i don’t overthink and convince myself otherwise i guess.
I'd just like to offer– I personally can only wear white gold or stainless steel without this happening to me. (Haven't tried some of the more expensive or out there metals but, in terms of mainstream “affordable” metals)
My husband has purchased multiple things for me in sterling silver– things with real diamonds or sapphires or whatever legitimate bells and whistles. But sterling silver oxidizes on my skin within two or three days without fail.
Definitely use this as a springboard for conversation! I loved my engagement ring too, but I also love wearing jewelry that I literally never take off. My husband has since learned what metals are good and what are bad, but I have many pieces in my collection from him or my father or whomever that I adore, but just can't wear.
It sounds like, even though you knew the ring wasn't very expensive, perhaps you weren't expecting the color change? (Unless we're talking like, extremely inexpensive here) If that's the case, I would sort of lean into that when you talk to him. Either way, be sure to emphasize how much you loved the proposal, how much you can't wait to be his wife, and how much you appreciated all the thought he put into everything. Be sure to show him the oxidation so it doesn't look like a cop out or anything.
we don’t have kids, and at this point we aren’t considering it. could you explain how he’s abusive? he isn’t like this all the time, we do have good days. i don’t want to be someone who has blinders on and can’t see it for myself, but that’s how i feel right now. i just need someone to explain it clearly so that i don’t overthink and convince myself otherwise i guess.
I'd just like to offer– I personally can only wear white gold or stainless steel without this happening to me. (Haven't tried some of the more expensive or out there metals but, in terms of mainstream “affordable” metals)
My husband has purchased multiple things for me in sterling silver– things with real diamonds or sapphires or whatever legitimate bells and whistles. But sterling silver oxidizes on my skin within two or three days without fail.
Definitely use this as a springboard for conversation! I loved my engagement ring too, but I also love wearing jewelry that I literally never take off. My husband has since learned what metals are good and what are bad, but I have many pieces in my collection from him or my father or whomever that I adore, but just can't wear.
It sounds like, even though you knew the ring wasn't very expensive, perhaps you weren't expecting the color change? (Unless we're talking like, extremely inexpensive here) If that's the case, I would sort of lean into that when you talk to him. Either way, be sure to emphasize how much you loved the proposal, how much you can't wait to be his wife, and how much you appreciated all the thought he put into everything. Be sure to show him the oxidation so it doesn't look like a cop out or anything.
Best of luck!