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Di_Alex, 21 y.o.
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Date: December 26, 2022
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I think it is best that you leave and find someone, who will prioritize you and spending alone time with you, someone childless. You can live! the alternative lifestyle with them.
Living young family life when one is not family-inclined must feel really suffocating. My sympathy goes to you.
I have no family here to stay with. We moved to a new province 6 months ago. But I can stay in a hotel. I don’t want to divorce though. I really don’t. I would 100% do marriage counseling though and think we need it at this point.
What for? Do you need her to be your babysitter? Come on!!!!
Try counseling first. I think you could both use some one-on-one counseling as well as couples counseling.
Sounds like a lot of issues need to come out.
It’s good to hear she had the bc before because she knows that she handled it before.
The antidepressant will continue to have more impact over the first 3-4 weeks. At about 4 weeks it has had its full effect.
absolutely time for a serious talk about getting help. Thanks
Yes our financial situation is different. But I literally pay for everything. He’s lived with me for about two years and I only started asking him to pay rent starting this past November and only $300. I also let him use my car to doordash as much as he wants to. So I just was expecting a little something for Christmas with how much I support him and take care of him. But I can see now from the responses I was wrong. I will apologize.
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Love? Listen to yourself
This. OP stop marriage counseling. Go to your own therapy though. She is using that shit against you
Take it to the post office and mail it. Do you think he’d keep your shit just because you breakup?
No they are not.
You can believe something should be legal, while disliking the thing yourself.
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I hate people like you because you’re a self righteous cunt
I hate these kind of situation. First of all you should make sure that you have someone that you can talk to and get support that is kind of neutral, that is someone that listens but not tells you how to act or how to feel. It's important when dealing with stressful events to feel safe and not be pressured how to feel or act.
That probably includes not listening to much to people here because most will have strong opinions and that won't make you feel better in the long run.
Whatever you do with this situation take it as a lesson that it's never a good situation to sleep with a male platonic friend. I can't tell you the number of times I have talked to girls or women that has been raped in that situation. Sometimes by a predator that used sleeping as a way to get close to a girl why having deniabilty, that she wanted to. More often because the lines between consent got blurred sometimes exagerated by alcohol. I wouldn't recommend anyone, boy or girl, to put themselves in that situation.
You suck.
They say a ring size of 6 is average. Are her fingers more slender or a bit larger than average fingers you’ve seen?
Hold her hand
This isn't the most accurate method but it can be a start if there are no other options. The next time the two of you are holding hands, see if you have a finger that's similarly sized to her ring finger.
You're going to get downvoted for this but you're absolutely right.
Putting all this emotional baggage on your partner is really selfish – if you've gotten to this stage you've fucked up in a million ways already, and now you're handing your partner a whole bag of insecurities and relationship anxiety because you couldn't handle yourself like a decent human being.
Ultimately OP knows his partner best, so I won't comment further on whether I think she's being completely honest, but I think he's justified in feeling angry.
From the government, a bank, or the store selling them? Sorry, American here. Totally fascinated.
Usually you can finance appliances here through the store, but it’s based on credit and not restricted to low income people. However rentals here, some appliances are provided: ovens, fridge, occasionally washer and drier. Lots of apartment complexes have on-site washers and driers that you share with other tenants and pay for using, but if it’s provided in your unit then you don’t pay. Built-in microwaves are not unheard of, but are uncommon.
i know that’s the problem, and it wasn’t my intention. my current boy friends is literally amazing i am just stuck on my ex so it’s nude to put all my effort into him.
It's his friend, not hers. They can keep it private for sure and it's not a given that she's even visiting them at home at all. If they are adults who lay down the rules and boundaries there doesn't need to be any smirking and nose rubbing. This isn't kindergarten.
No dont tell her. It’s completely normal to dream about sexual encounters and you dont have control over your dreams. The more you fixate on it the more of a roll it will play in your mind and the more you will dream about it.
Just acknowledge it is a dream you had, which you have no control over, and move on with your life. You are not at blame, try not to feel guilty.
No dont tell her. It’s completely normal to dream about sexual encounters and you dont have control over your dreams. The more you fixate on it the more of a roll it will play in your mind and the more you will dream about it.
Just acknowledge it is a dream you had, which you have no control over, and move on with your life. You are not at blame, try not to feel guilty.
i feel like you continuously answered your question. he seems manipulative, he turns the “inconvenience” of you having feelings into something he can get attention for while getting to ignore what you are upset about.
i don’t think you should stay with him, and i think you know that. you should cut your losses and move on. it’s better for you in the long run. 🙂
You need a therapist. Your reaction to this after all this time is very extreme and it would be beneficial for you to work through this with a professional.
✌️
Gender is man, woman, non binary etc. Sex is male, female intersex. You don't call a male dog a man, a female cat a woman. Being a man is a social construct, it's not innately linked to your genitals. Gender is a spectrum, you don't have to understand it to respect it. OPs partner is a man.
Talk to him about it. Say you’re not judging, but it just makes you feel a little uneasy and you want to discuss it.
Porn is a fantasy gateway. It’s not real life. I wouldn’t let this really affect you.
Yeah the mature thing to do is to explain how his needs aren't being met and talk about it.
A derogatory term like “fish” is basically name calling and it's not constructive or productive.
Unless of course his goal is to make her insecure.
There's no magic way to convince people of things beyond very unethical methods like brainwashing or manipulation
Please don't try and couple your trainwreck of a son with an innocent woman.
Suggest therapy to him but obviously you can't force him.
she herself asked for me to unfollow every girl
That changes things and should be added to the post for better context also in the future if a girl ever asks you to do that break up right then and there
Well if they were accepting of you coming out and telling them then they won’t a problem you being into men too. Personally I don’t prefer to put labels. As long as your happy I feel that’s all maybe your family wants.
I think that this is actually not that uncommon, especially for someone who is looking at settling down with their “first” and not sure if they missed out.
It is entirely possible that six months from now that she will have these thoughts again. However, if she is being up front with you about everything, then I don't think it is entirely likely. You are letting Reddit whisper the worst possibilities in your ear, and it is entirely possible, of course. But it is also possible that she needed to know even for a couple of days that she could break away and look for something else.
I will tell you this, however. If you two decide to take a longer break now while you figure things out, most likely, you will not come back together again.
The question for you is, how do you feel about her?
I feel like she could be the floozy server who flirts and hangs on everyone at work. Either she’s self conscious or projecting.
I’m going to push back on the sentiment that drunk words are sober thoughts because it really isn’t as cut and dry as that. When people have had a couple and they are feeling good, and the filter gets lost, then this statement is absolutely true. Secrets that maybe you would’ve kept to yourself you are now blabbing to the bar. Approaching the coworker who you secretly had a crush on. Thinking that your “jokes” are landing while everyone is smiling politely but cringing. But things absolutely do take a turn, and alcohol induced psychosis is a real thing, especially people who binge drink a lot. I’ve heard friends before say some absolutely bonkers stuff when they are black out drunk that I know they would not say it if they were sober.
But the consistency is where it tips in favor of this being something he does feel to some degree when sober. The thing about loosening inhibitions is that when you are drunk you know you are making mistakes/behaving out of character. You just don’t care as much as you would when sober. So he knows he is hurting people when he drinks while drunk, and doesn’t really care. That lack of care unfortunately is consistent while he is sober.
Since apparently his last partner was 19 when they met and he continues to date people from that age even though he is much older, he does seem emotionally stunted.
That said, I'm in a relationship with the same age difference, only it started in my 20s. We had a lot in common and it worked out.
Just distance yourself from anyone and everyone involved in the drama. Concentrate on your studies
All men are animals.
So are women.
Just sit your gf down and tell her how you feel about wanting her sis to tag along….sort this out now, learn to set boundaries as a couple.
This guy sounds like a real piece of work and a controlling douchebag. I pray my daughters never run into men like this. Your father is absolutely spot on. Never invest in something your not attached to. You could do the renovations and he can dump you the next day at no penalty. Listen to your fathers advice it is very wise.
Commenting on how much she eats is ridiculous!!! Just because you require less food doesn’t make her bad or wrong. Also she may be on her period. The week before your period it’s just science you eat more. Are you at all understanding or considerate? Lots of judgment and blame going on. Maybe she’s stressed you’re judging her every move.
That’s 100% what happened. He would manipulate and turn it on me
No, honestly your right. Thank you for opening up my eyes.