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Date: October 9, 2022
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Could be the controlling husband thinks them not having as much sex as he wants means not enough to get pregnant.
Could be that she is 3+ months pregnant and got pregnant in a time they were having sex.
Could be OPs husband is the baby daddy and has not only been helping his creep buddy monitor his wife, but also monitoring his affair partner.
Maybe she had an affair. Who knows. It's still incredibly creepy that the wife is being monitored by her husband and his buddy. Then OP and husband have the neighbors over to watch videos of how isolated the neighbor wife is as if that's totally normal.
Again, that is so sexist to assume that any woman with a man is just after his money. No. I am not a sugar baby. No he is not my “sugar daddy”. Grow up
If I were you, I wouldn't date anyone, including her. Maybe in the future, but without the pressure of the pregnancy making it so. Lots of people co-parent without ever being really committed or married. She set boundaries, and there are consequences to them. You should both discuss boundaries. Focus on getting your life ready for a baby.
If he's in denial about being an alcoholic, then nothing will change. Don't throw your life away on him.
When he won't properly take care of the dog, it's necessary to consider re-homing. It's not about “disposability”. It's about what's fair for the dog. Fiancé is in the 100% right.
A active social life banging grandpa's for free. What a life…
This is stolen from twitter” Q1. My wife bores me & she has a bisexual past, so I suggested we open the marriage so I can date. BUT—she’s dating MEN. I can’t enjoy dating because I’m concerned with who she’s sleeping with; one guy is trying to replace me. She refuses to close the marriage. Advice. #SBCCHAT” 8:22 AM · Jan 11, 2023
I see you filing for divorce in the near future, because you chose and begged her to open up the marriage INSTEAD of working to fix the problems. Now someone else is showing her the love and emotional support that you should have been giving her, and he's showing her what it feels like being loved. Set her free to go and find someone else who loves her and will love being with just her. YOU were the one with the problem not your wife.
Can't see this one going horribly wrong at some point. Yeah she gave you a hall pass. You don't want to use it in the same hall your wife is in. Find some rando online. Do not crawl into bed with someone your wife knows.
Do some searches on Reddit about open marriages. It's a minefield and for good reason. It's doable but you're shitting where you eat. Don't do that.
The way you phrased your question probably caught her off guard and made her very uncomfortable. She probably feels there wasn’t a choice for her, thus the long silence. ‘When are you free for coffee’ vs ‘would you like to go to coffee with me sometime’ is a massive difference. I’d leave her alone after all this, as it’ll probably be massively awkward if you try striking up conversation with her again.
Generally I think this is more of a typical 'guy advice', but what do I know, might help out a girl as well.
Work on yourself to become a person you yourself would deem 'lovable', that way you will not have to second guess if he loves you or not, because you will be certain of your value.
good luck, and if this is shit advice, Im sorry
Question: does she work? Do you want/let her work?
Because honestly, the answer is simple. If you're comfortable enough footing the bills then she can go to work and have a savings account if you 2 break up.
Just from experience, if she's not asking for your money (as you say), then she's asking permission to get a job. BUT if she turns down the idea of getting a job, then you need to open your eyes. She is a grown woman and having someone pay the bills should make it very easy for her to set up a cushion to fall back on.
I mean yea this is the real issue
You have to get out of your feelings. Your in-laws may not understand the emotional toil of IVF process but actively relate childbirth; it doesn’t mean your plight is less important. You are being extremely sensitive. Your in-laws telling you to join them next year is a valid solution; it doesn’t mean they don’t care. Good luck with your journey.
I was drinking tea when I hit that line and almost choked. . A cousin of mine who is in her late 20s got pregnant last year, but it took work and tests and stress and heart break to get there. (She now has a happy baby boy.) So it can be a lot of things, but an easy romantic journey it isn't.
This would have never happened in a Yoruba family. /s
Remember, when you play in the devils sandbox don't complain when you get sand in your bed.
Of course there’s manipulative people out there. This post doesn’t give enough to even make such a close minded assumption. Trauma is very real and this OP gave two shits about following up on her friend so close, she was her MOH
I don’t get the “we” mentality here. You tried quitting together and it didn’t work. So stop talking about quitting together and you just quit.
The dynamic is unhealthy although I can’t really describe it. The fact that she’s giving you puppy eyes and begs you to let her vape is just… bizarre. You’re both adults, deal with your addiction individually. If you don’t want to be with someone who makes it harder for you to quit, don’t be with them.
why does it matter if he admits or not
you have proof
thats all
you dont need his permission to leave
That's it though, I'm so scared of loosing him… He is genuinely the kindest and most loving person I've met and I know I will never love someone as much ever again if he breaks up with me…
I can't stand a cheater. I'm so so sorry. I can't even imagine walking in on that. Like being stabbed in the freaking heart.
Best comment.
I myself am 24F and have had some problems with maintaining chores after a long day or when I’m tired so here are some tips I have with these, even just with chores in general 1. I follow a 20/10 rule, or a 30/15 rule. Clean for 20 minutes. Break for 10. Clean for another 20, rest for another 10. It prevents my burn out and if I set times on my phone to keep me in line it’s effective
If it takes less than 2 minutes, don’t procrastinate it. If you know you need to take the trash out and you’re already on the way out, don’t think “ah I’m in a hurry I’ll do it later when I get home” just take it and do it.
Try to do a general cleaning each night. I’m talking just basic, take dishes to the sink, clothes to the hamper, any trash to the bin. Takes about 5 minutes and prevents things from piling up.
Also, tell your mom that you realize how you’ve effected her and that you want to be better. Maybe ask her if there’s anything in particular she would like to see. I think it’s great that you are able to realize that you’re acting wrong and it’s good you’re seeking out advice on how to implement changes
He's just a cheating bitch. You're gonna be better off in the long, short, and medium run if you end things
You go by twisted ways, scaredycat.
I mean, she already proved to you that “in heath and in sickness” doesn't really work for her. She already left you when you were sick, so why give her another opportunity to let her do it again? Your body is undoubtedly going to change throughout your life and she is not going to be there for it.
Were you starting to have second thoughts about the relationship before he proposed? That kept you on the hook for two more years.
Listen, I’m in my 50s. I have a 21 year-old daughter who I think is mature beyond her years. There is no way I would respect a 44 year-old showing interest in her. A 25 year-old is a CHILD to a man my age. And a mature child is still a child.