Absent Father (50M) Is Desperate To Be At My (18F) HS Graduation

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Hello everyone!

As the title states my absent father (50'sM) is desperate to be at my (18F) HS Graduation. Our relationship has always been sour, ever since I was young my father has never made it a priority to be in my life, wether it was attending school recitals or having the money to pay for back to school items he always had an excuse as to why he couldn't be present.

I am now more than capable of forming my own opinions about him, I think about all of the times I have been socially and economically disadvantaged in comparison to the rest of my peers because my mother had to often work 2 jobs to take care of me. He threw us out of his home when got mad one day ( we were searching for homes, and luckily we were able to get a house in time). Anyways, these past few years he has been making constant attempts at rekindling a relationship with me (he often calls sobbing and distressed), however I've moved on and healed from all of the resentment that this situation and his absence has caused me over the years, not once has he verbally apologized to me about his wrongdoings, and generally he is an unpleasant person to be around.

Fast forward to now graduation is right around the corner and everyone wants an invite to my graduation (which is nice because it shows me that I have a lot of support) however I want to be very intentional with who i'm inviting, only the people who have had a meaningful impact on my life will be extended an invitation. So now my father wants a graduation invitation, and he either calls my sibling to get into contact with me ( I have him blocked btw), or he contacts my mom (she's LC with him unless it's about a backlog of child support payments he owes between me and my sibling) or my half sibling (NC tries to get in contact with me, currently blocked as well).

Anyways the pressure is boiling and is making me stressed, and I just hope information about my graduation location doesn't get leaked, or that my mom & sibling don't give him a graduation entry ticket (from pressure that this situation might push him over the edge/he still doesn't pay CS on time or consistently but this situation might anger him further to completely not paying at all, but if thats the case my mother would just have to go to court again unfortunately).

So I'm asking you all, how I should go about this situation, should I continue no contact and silently dissolve this relationship, should I call him and tell him he's not invited/tell him I no longer want to continue this relationship any further? I'm genuinely not interested in continuing my relationship with him any further, but the pressure between the excessive calling from him and half sibling is getting to me and also a part of me feels guilty for cutting this relationship off, but I truthfully want to move on from this relationship so I can flourish and move on with the rest of my life.

TLDR: Absent father (50'sM) is desperate to go to my (18F) HS graduation. The pressure between excessive calling from him and half sibling is getting to me, and I desperately want to end this relationship with him but I'm not sure how to go about it.

*Please do not reblog any of my post information off this subreddit/and the reddit platform. Thank you.*

submitted by /u/No-Cupcake4329
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Date: April 15, 2023

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