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Aimee Kelly, 35 y.o.
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Date: October 19, 2022
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I'm 44f and emotionally safe is the flipping dream. I never realised how much I needed that to be my true self (be it alone or in a partnership). It does sound like these women aren't emotionally mature.
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You’re a coward and an idiot Get back with her. Go see a therapist
Because it’s false confidence. She is faking it. I do this too. Because confidence is sexy and I know that. But deep down I’m a coward.
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They've got the dad bod to boot too!
I don't know about my masculinity, per se, but I'd like to think I'm more fleshed out? I have hobbies and passions, and I don't even look that much like the character.
Yeah. If he can’t cope now then he needs to mature a lot before anyone has kids with him.
Pregnancy and birth are not all cupcakes and rainbows, especially if there are additional factors like tearing or c-sections or whatnot. And babies sure don’t give a damn about holding it in (wait for the first poonami), from either end. Sounds like he would be the type to avoid the birth and any kid related stuff after that he seems gross.
I wouldn't be apologizing for a thing. She needs help and should be told so.
Yeah – that bitch took it too far.
If I were you, anytime these thoughts come up, just repeat a mantra to yourself. “She’s just as upset as I am. She didn’t want this. She left immediately. She’s the type of girl to immediately tell me if something like this happens, which is a good thing”.
Add whatever you need to to that. You’ll get over it eventually man. Good luck
This relationship isn't for you. Move on.
You leave. That's how you handle it. I don't often advocate for people to break up, but him saying that shows he has no regard for you or your feelings. And isn't mature enough to be in an adult relationship. You deserve someone that actually respects and desires you and will treat you as such.
So you were 15 and he was 20??
Tell her the truth, that you're a racist asshole who just strung her along for 2 years. You don't get to get out of this being a good guy.
Omg just cut him off
This is exactly what I’d do too. If I was him, I wouldn’t even want some “heyyyy, don’t worry” talk, I’d just want to forget that this ever happened. Pretending like it didn’t happen is the best you can do.
Is she your girlfriend or are you dating other girls as well?
As another Irish person I cannot see anything wrong or alarming about about having one pint after work!
I'm on your side here, I think this is the crux of the issue than anything else: “my bf just told me he doesn't know any men that would like their girlfriend drinking in a pub”?
If you decided to have a Heineken of Guinness zero would he still be pissed off?
Is there a compromise, rather than going in every evening after work you keep it at 2 evenings?
If your boyfriend went down to the pub midweek to watch the football (as many lads do) and had 2 or 3 pints would you be equally as annoyed?
Yeah, you should leave, but if you have nowhere to go, I say wait till tomorrow, since his parents are cool with it. Also, I know it’s sad, but at least you came to the realization about kids and marriage early on in your life and didn’t wait till you were way older. That would have wasted way more of y’all’s time, and biological clocks. 11 years is a long time, especially for someone that’s only 26, hell a lots of those years, you were a teen. But, hopefully things work out for the both of you.
Right now, she has things really easy. You are doing all the work in the relationship and paying for everything too. Why would she change?
I understand that stress has far-reaching and debilitating effects both mentally and physically, but if she can't have a discussion about it without getting stressed, then maybe she needs therapy.
Should you bring up something that is bothering you in your relationship or hold that resentment inside forever? The healthier option is to discuss something with your partner but thats up to you. Mabye he is good at those things? Shut him up real quick by having him prove it. Or it shuts you down when he does prove it..I am a guy though and when people start bragging I am more than happy to pull our a bill and say 'prove it'.
kinda hard to say on this one. Some people are just loudmouths and great at everything(you meet them on the internet a lot, the amount of rocket scientists who have won mr Olympia on here is amazing). then there are others who just are confident in their skills and like to talk about it.
for example, I had a GF who didnt like to give compliments..She hated when I would glow myself up over certain things and would try to put me down..One day, we are going by a park and I tell her I used to dominate in basketball there and she rolls her eyes and gives me the sure you are great at everything..so we pull over, I get in a pickup game, pretty much dominate in jeans…She finally gets it and apologizes. Relationship didn't last though, I didnt like someone trying to put me down and not just be supportive (yeah you dominated baby, would love to see that)..so could go both ways.
on a final note.