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1. Question: Did he grow up with close people going through major medical events?

   I know this sounds messed up/unbelievable but I didn’t realize major medical procedures and diagnoses were a big deal until I was mid 20s and glossed over a close friend who’s mom went to surgery. I grew up watching that stuff all the time happen to close relatives so I didn’t think it was a big deal. In my mind it was “It sucks, it happens, prognosis isn’t the worst so it’s just how life goes…”.I obviously feel bad now but my point is if he grew up a certain way he can recognize he was being selfish without seeing the full impact. I think it’s not super common for people to grow up like me but just wondering did he?

   When something is common to you, especially in childhood or a trauma it just normalizes it.

   Did his parents care more about grades and success than wellness/life? Why does he care about grades so much?

   Assuming he didn’t grow up normalizing extreme health problems or having grades forced on him to the point nothing else matters I would say it’s a red flag

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