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Date: October 28, 2022
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I think it could possibly be innocent, but the fact that he cheated on you already in the past, it’s possible that he might cheat on you again. I’m not sure if any cheater deserves a second chance, but that’s your decision. I think that you have to learn from his past mistakes and don’t take this lightly. It’s definitely a red flag. Things always seem innocent until it’s not.
No no. Post it again.
Please find a women's shelter and ask for help. They specialize in helping women in your situation. They can provide you the resources you need and a place to stay where you can be safe.
Reread what you wrote I think about what advice you would give if your sister or best friends wrote this post. You would tell her she needs to find a way out of the situation.
It depends on the recording laws in your country. Reddit can’t give you an answer to this.
“I'm too upset to cook right now. If you're hungry, you'll need to find something to eat for yourself tonight”. Easy peasy.
Even if it was true, she shouldn't have said that . She is either stupid or too honest to even confess that.
She has successfully wrecked the relationship without actually committing adultery.
However, you must decide and figure how much you going to let it wreck you.
Personally, I know that certain things needn't be asked or known like in your case. It's a blissful in being ignorant sometimes. I don't pry things that cannot be put back or is destructive.
The only way to come out of this is a little powerplay which is being confident yet making your wife stew on it for a while. Let her absorb her consequences and learn. Or ” perhaps, I must think about our neighbour while we are doing it. “
I know it sounds petty but desperate times ,desperate measures….
You say you don't plan on changing his beliefs, but in the same paragraph you say you feel you can change his beliefs with a little more nudge.
If he is respecting you and you are both letting each other have an opinion, then there's no problem, right? The problem seems to be you wanting to make him come to your side, instead of letting him be and change in his own pace. Why is it so important for you that he needs to acknowledge and agree with you on this right away? I think he's doing an impressive job of facing something that seems to be a very difficult topic for him, and where he's meeting resistance and judgment from his wife. Why do you want more from him?
I'm not sure the feelings you're having are about your brother or your partner. I think there's something that is bothering you, and you're trying to squash that feeling. You're trying to change your brother and say it's for your partner. Does your partner want you to go this hard at your brother? Is this really what your partner want you to do? Will your partner really be unable to tolerate that your brother is having a bit difficult with this, and he might need some time to be entirely ok with it? I don't think so. Most people will understand a big change in perspective takes time to digest. And most people will be happy that the person is even changing because of caring so much about you that they are willing to look at your perspective, even when it's very uncomfortable for them
It's quite possible you're creating a mountain out of a mole hill. With anxiety, you're not going to see things for what they are. Just the “what they could be's”. If you had/have anxiety before the relationship and now it's worse, you may wish to get your anxiety under control so that it doesn't interfere in your relationships. This would mean (most likely) breaking up with this guy unless he's willing to help work things out. There's no magic pill and you'll probably always have anxiety, but you can work to control it better where it doesn't rule your life. On a side note, I kind of agree that at 4 months it is awful quick to be already living together. Four months is not enough time to get to know someone and if your anxiety is manifesting in front of him he could be having second thoughts. If you both choose to stay together, I would not spend more than one night a week at his place. Don't mean you can't go out and have a good time, just don't spend the night. You really need to concentrate on yourself as much as possible and seeing a therapist who specializes in anxiety should be able to give you tools to help cope with possibly medication. Good luck, I wish you the best.
I mean… As long as it doesn't go on the direction of intercourse, I have a good grip on things, I eat well, I sleep, I take care of my cats, I keep my flat clean, I shower, I have the basics of human life down. I work as good as I can and I feed my mum (I feel it's fair, since she took care of me for 21 years). I'm okay with how things are, aside from the one thing…. Thank you . I can defo improve on the once a year issue, though!