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Date: October 26, 2022
I see that you and most readers are playing armchair therapist. I'd say you need to hear from a real one.
Meanwhile, have you tried bargaining? Is there nothing you can offer her that she would make an effort to get? And I hate to say Stick as well as Carrot, but is there nothing you can deny her that she would make an effort not to lose? Your narrative suggests that she cares for absolutely nothing, but that's a very testable proposition, and I see no harm in trying.
Honestly that white lie doesn’t bother me, he told a massive lie about his ex that I left him about. He swore not to lie again, I have acess to his phone.
He’s been working since like 16, doing an apprenticeship. I’m sure he earns that much
No one would put in a ban if it were a one off
I would
I am always much more like to get emotional and cry when alcohol is involved.
She cheated. Get out now.
Leave it alone. If you were going to tell her, it should have happened right after the incident. Your friend will either tell her himself or he won’t, but it’s been years and they have a family. Unless you are aware of any infidelity since that incident, this one isn’t your business.
Just found his other post where he snapped at his gf for not packing his suitcase. This feels hopeless and the parents are definitely not helping. I also find it strange that OP thinks barely anyone lives away from at home 21. Actually, its far more common for people to not live at home at 21 (and especially at 26). He's lucky he has that advantage, but it is not as common as he's claiming.
This relationship is doomed…he’s always going to blame you for any sexual relationship you engage in together and make you feel dirty and unworthy like you’re leading him astray when he’s a consenting adult who could have just said no.
Conveniently he didn’t say no or that he felt it was wrong until after he had a sexual release. And this isn’t going to improve. Every time he “gives in” to his urges he’s going to blame you for causing him to “sin” and you’re going to get used.
While I can respect a persons choice to abstain from sex or not engage in other sexual activities before marriage (and sometimes after if they’re not comfortable with them) due to personal preference or religious beliefs, but I can’t respect someone who isn’t accountable for their own actions.
He’s trying to blame you because he didn’t say no, think about that for a minute, do you really want to be blamed for his choices or in this case lack of because you’re a woman and it’s therefore your fault he sinned? He’s obviously got some serious religious hang ups and a very unhealthy association with religion and sex.
For what its worth, I'd guess its neither. I've masturbated to things i wasn't proud of before. Some things multiple times, but that I'll never do again. Some that i didnt even like, but just did. The objective in the moment is just to get it over with and pretend it never happened. The objective of masturbating most of the time is to get it over with and for nobody to find out you did it.
Thinking its weird is definitely healthy. Anybody who says its not, knows it is and is just huffing copium, cause when you're alone with nothing to ground you, its easy to just do it and move on hoping you forget and nobody ever finds out.
Unless you two have agreed to an open relationship at the start, doing sexual things with others is really cheating, especially at the expense of your sex life. Is that guy friend really impartial?
NO or better HELL NO! He's not the last man on earth and you need to find your self-respect and self-worth and move on. I don't buy his sobbing…
I think it you do date and it's successful, you'll probably change his mind on a lot of things and he will do the same to you and you'll balance out.
My stepdad was super Republican before he married my mom. Now he's switched sides and is a balanced democrat. Not hard left, but gentle left and open minded. All thanks to my mom.
The opposite happened to my aunt. She was pretty left, but married my uncle and now she's a little too right for even me to talk to.
I see this happen a lot. Two people have different views, they date, they talk, they balance out. Maybe one switches their whole POV. Or maybe they just never talk about politics ever and are fine.
It could work, but you both have to be open minded.