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Today I want to come with you, I feel playful and hard ??SHOW CUM?? [GOAL MET]
Date: October 26, 2022
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He’s 32. He decided a long time ago.
This isn’t a compromise situation.
Your hesitation is understandable. You WISH he was the guy and feel your options running out. ?
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Oh please don’t marry or have children with this man, you are in for serious hardships.
My advice is to get tested over the next few months. Some STIs take a few months to show up.
Ok but what if you were married and you had a child and your wife suddenly got very sick or was in an accident and needed an extended stay in hospital. What you gonna feed yourself and your kid? You can’t just feed them takeaways every meal for a long period.
First of all, it’s not “understandably” a shock to her. This has been in motion for a while and the logical breakup finally came to fruition. Breakups logically always hurt absolutely, but if it’s truly a “shock” to her then she’s either been willingly ignorant, or just legitimately ignorant.
The same applies to your initial break. It broke her, but logically it didn’t just happen for no reason. A series of events led to it. This is honestly what you should focus on the most; you took a “break,” nothing got fixed, and you had to end it.
In saying that, why do you have to support her? What do you honestly think you can even do or say to make her come to terms with reality? This was reality for a long time.
Hold firm with how you feel. There’s no confusing emotions. You need to continue to make that clear. Good luck.
I agree with like 96% of this.
I have seen miscommunication too often in my life to rule out the possibility that the gf just doesn't 'get' how big an issue this is to him.
The way he's explained it to us makes that obvious, but, maybe he never actually explained it to her in exactly the same way he's explained it to us. The fact that he comes asking for help on 'how to say it' and his biggest issue is feeling unheard indicates a very strong likelihood that his communication on the subject was ineffective.
It's possible from her point of view either there is no problem or the problem has already been resolved and she's unaware of anything to the contrary.
So I think a little more weight on “Try to get the point home better” is warranted.
But otherwise you're not wrong. I think it's a little overkill to create a scenario of the husband escalating though.
He comments a lot here…makes me think he is OPs husband
How do you know they will?
If you get accustomed to drama as a part of your relationship, it might seem as excitement because you never know what is going to happen. You end up always waiting for the other shoe to drop and how to deal with it. So it’s a never ending cycle of ups and downs.
As for passion, just ask if there is anything he’d like to try or something you don’t do together, but likes. Then do it.
I do think finding out where he is coming from and why he’s making the list is important too. Also, has he had contact recently with his ex and it’s making him think about the two relationships, and what he wants? Or is it an old note you found from earlier in your relationship?
I’m hoping he is my Mr Right tho haha ?
Not really. My mom is in her 70s and her only income is the small amount she gets from Social Security. And I've never been great at making friends so..yeah.
no, you can't read into it. he only accepted that you wouldn't have a romantic relationship. people decline relationships with attractive, smart and successful people for all sorts of reasons. depression, post-break up hangups, addiction, or they are just chill being single for a second. or any number of things. don't let this drag you down too much. it's ok to be disappointed but don't convince yourself it's your fault for any reason
Because he likes you lol
The reality is this was a toxic and abuse ridden dynamic with a broken manipulator. He used a lot of common emotional manipulation tactics and never once was he actually a healthy partner. The cycle of false stability, meltdown, reconciliation and the way it loops over and over, even if staggered by periods of alienation, a trauma bond. Many people stuck in this sort of mindset conflate the feelings they have with love, but really how can you call any of this love at all.
“the longer I’m around you, the harder I find it to respect your boundaries. This situation triggers me and I can’t hold myself accountable to just be platonic.”
Because he basically has promised he will hurt you. And while you might think 'well that was a nice thing for him to do, right?' I personally see it the opposite. This is his disclaimer, this is how he rationalises to himself that if you chase him you accept he will be toxic. He may be in therapy but it is clear he has made very little progress because between what has basically been outright harassment/stalking by showing up drunk like that and this truly embarrassing and toxic warning to you he is as bad as ever.
Just looking for personal experiences. Thank you!
Don't ask. They get to choose who is in their wedding. Just see how it plays out, how they communicate with you and use it to inform how you go forward with this person.
She's not throwing 3 years away. She is not happy with you. She's dumping you for a better life.
That's how relationships work. You date. Find out that you are not right for each other. Then break up. That's life.
Block. Delete. And move on.
Further context here,
Till today we have not tried extensively to have baby and we were just about to begin trying but things went south, there were times in this duration where our parents kept asking about having baby, my mom took one step ahead and went to doctor along with my wife to find out if anything is wrong clinically although we have been telling her everything was alright, understandably by wife didn't take this well and since I don't like confrontation I let the incidence pass and then later spoke to my mom it was not a right thing to do, at that moment she didn't take me seriously, she went about talking to other family member about this, again my wife didn't take this well, one day we sat and had a conversation where my wife told my mom that there was nothing wrong clinically and we did have a pregnancy and we terminated dude to restriction to travel and we could not be with each other to enjoy the pregnancy, my dream is to always stay with my wife and look after her in this period. Again my mom didn't take this well, she might have gone around telling close family that my wife terminated the pregnancy she might have made it sound like it was her decision and not ours. Fast forward to now, Few weeks ago my wife found out that I had girlfriends before I meet her, I had not told this my self initially because I was worried how she may take this, I agree this is my fault, I had major doubts she may not take this well, which made it worst when she found out and didn't come out of me, one of the major reason why I had not told her before is because she believe in “one partner life time” and she was serious about it, considering some of the things mentally she was going through I was super scared to tell her this and put off telling about it ever since. Now that she has got to know she didn't take it well that I had not told about this before although I had hinted her before that I had girlfriends before. Between all the I know we were not emotionally well connected, I always wanted to improve out relationship I was putting all the efforts possible and I still was not upto the mark in connecting emotionally and lack of communication, but I never gave up, I was always putting effort in improving it as much as possible from my end. Now she things i'm a bad person, she says I manipulate her, and she says I don't stand up for her, there were many times I have stood up to her just not in front of her because I feel if she sees me fighting with other people she may not take it well, I feel like she will take it in a wrong way. She is a kind of person who responds rudely in her voice and delivery but she don't mean it bad, but this worries me, which I have been communicating to her all this time, I don't find her talking romantic but I can easily find her talking rude and harsh about me or other people. We had a very big fight today and she asked me to leave the country we are living and go back home because she is not able to tolerate me, I have always been sitting next to her trying to convince and calm her down. Im promising her I will be a better person and understand her sensitively, i'm willing to put all my efforts into this, she is not able to accept my mom's act and she keeps scolding me that I sound like my mom and I act like my mom and she is not able to accept that I didn't mention about the past girlfriends. At this point she is sleeping across me on the bed and i'm typing on reddit looking for advice and help for my self, how can I make her understand we have better future than our past, I don't want to give up on this marriage, help me with this reddit, let me know if I need to make anything clear in what I have told, I may have missed mentioning things which may not be on top of my mind right now. I think past is gone and we have to focus on future as long as we are involved and willing make it better, What do you think of this situation?
They can have vid of her being beaten and raped in front of child and it won’t change
Maybe, who knows, talk to her