My guy, I'm genuinely not trying to be a dick here, and I truly apologize if I come off as such, but you're literally drawing fantasies. Look at what you've said here. You exchanged Christmas presents. Friends do that. But on top of that alone, you didn't hug? Hugs are innocent and not even that happened? That's more weird that anything else.
You eat lunch together daily. Friends do that. She mentions her boyfriend. Read that again, she mentions her boyfriend to her friend daily. Something friends do. You get random snaps and DMs. Friends do that. Unless you're talking about nudes (which I assume isn't the case), it's all business as usual behavior. She was then away with her boyfriend and messaged you a meme and a food picture. Once again, completely innocent and normal behavior. You're viewing these actions as having potential romantic meaning. You say you're a very level headed person. These actions have literally no romantic meaning.
The issue here is that you're not viewing yourself as a friend. You're viewing yourself as another guy. So you see her as messaging you while away with her boyfriend as an indication that she's considering you romantically, and she's secretively and dangerously messaging said guy (you). But let's now look at it from two perspectives; one, she's messaging a friend and it's not a big deal. Her boyfriend likely is fully aware of it and you. Or two, she's legitimately messaging you inappropriately while with your boyfriend because she's into you. That's where you need to understand that if it'll happen with you, it'll happen to you.
I truly never assumed you planned to interfere. You didn't suggest that, which is good. But after all this, to give the advice you're asking for, it's again to tell you to take a step back and acknowledge all of this. It's fine to have a crush and to have fantasies. But that's where it needs to end. You're looking at this situation as having a potential future; it doesn't, and that's what I'm trying to drive home here. I don't at all think it's a slight against you or that she's not attracted to you or anything else that's going to be going through your head. She's just in a relationship, and hasn't legitimately indicated that she's looking to pursue you as anything more than a platonic friend.
Maybe there's more you left out, since your response suggested that you know the reality you're seeing. I'm just telling you that with the context provided, I don't see that at all here. Either way, remind yourself she's in a relationship. You don't have to quit, but you could establish boundaries. Hell, you could even be honest with her so that she understands why you're taking a step back. You then need to get into dating otherwise if you're not. You're putting her on a pedestal, but she's not the perfect person you're viewing her as.
This is some solid advice. Thankyou so much
My guy, I'm genuinely not trying to be a dick here, and I truly apologize if I come off as such, but you're literally drawing fantasies. Look at what you've said here. You exchanged Christmas presents. Friends do that. But on top of that alone, you didn't hug? Hugs are innocent and not even that happened? That's more weird that anything else.
You eat lunch together daily. Friends do that. She mentions her boyfriend. Read that again, she mentions her boyfriend to her friend daily. Something friends do. You get random snaps and DMs. Friends do that. Unless you're talking about nudes (which I assume isn't the case), it's all business as usual behavior. She was then away with her boyfriend and messaged you a meme and a food picture. Once again, completely innocent and normal behavior. You're viewing these actions as having potential romantic meaning. You say you're a very level headed person. These actions have literally no romantic meaning.
The issue here is that you're not viewing yourself as a friend. You're viewing yourself as another guy. So you see her as messaging you while away with her boyfriend as an indication that she's considering you romantically, and she's secretively and dangerously messaging said guy (you). But let's now look at it from two perspectives; one, she's messaging a friend and it's not a big deal. Her boyfriend likely is fully aware of it and you. Or two, she's legitimately messaging you inappropriately while with your boyfriend because she's into you. That's where you need to understand that if it'll happen with you, it'll happen to you.
I truly never assumed you planned to interfere. You didn't suggest that, which is good. But after all this, to give the advice you're asking for, it's again to tell you to take a step back and acknowledge all of this. It's fine to have a crush and to have fantasies. But that's where it needs to end. You're looking at this situation as having a potential future; it doesn't, and that's what I'm trying to drive home here. I don't at all think it's a slight against you or that she's not attracted to you or anything else that's going to be going through your head. She's just in a relationship, and hasn't legitimately indicated that she's looking to pursue you as anything more than a platonic friend.
Maybe there's more you left out, since your response suggested that you know the reality you're seeing. I'm just telling you that with the context provided, I don't see that at all here. Either way, remind yourself she's in a relationship. You don't have to quit, but you could establish boundaries. Hell, you could even be honest with her so that she understands why you're taking a step back. You then need to get into dating otherwise if you're not. You're putting her on a pedestal, but she's not the perfect person you're viewing her as.
Dude, if yoir for real, stick to your sugarbaby and adultery subreddits, and away from giving women advice.