You really look down on him. You need to pull your head out of the clouds, and put your feet firmly back on the ground. Work on yourself, sort your shit out!!
There's this saying in Africa “Everything that happens in a household was known to the spouses during the engagement, but the spouses did not attach too much importance to it.”
First sorry abou the truama you went through, but it sounds like your fiance does actually care for sex in a relationship and is frustrated that your relationship has no become you two being loving roommates. Not being on the same page regarding sex can be a big deal, it does end relationships/engagements/marriages, sounds like this is the case here, you want to be more like roommates and he wants a physical relationship, neither wrong but its probably not gonna work
Rehoming a dog that behaved this way is irresponsible and quite frankly will probably only make things worse.
There is probably a 1% chance that this dog ends up with the right new home with 0 interactions with other animals or children and with someone who can try to work with it.
I'm curious… How does she know what you're up to with your Dad and his AP? How is she able to “see” y'all being happy together? Is everyone talking about these interactions around her? Posting for her to see? (You can restrict things from being seen by certain people on sites like facebook…)
I can imagine how things might seem from her perspective… She was the one betrayed, but she likely feels he has been rewarded and left unscathed by his selfish indiscretions. That no one cares what he did to her. And if those people don't care, then she probably thinks they're likely to hurt her the same way, so she wants them to choose HER… Or leave her on her terms…
Therapy would be in her best interest to help her process her grief and pursue what is best for her… But her feelings, hurt, distrust and resentment isn't unfounded. Betrayal like that cuts DEEP.
It is good you're able to forgive your father. But do keep in mind that if he is willing and able to hurt someone as close to him as his WIFE and mother of his son for his own satisfaction, he is willing and able to do so to you too if he feels the benefit will be satisfactory enough to risk it. And his new AP, if she is willing to wreck a marriage, she isn't a good person to put a lot of faith in either as she also is willing to intentionally deeply hurt others for her benefit.
it absolutely wasn’t her place to tell and it definitely wasn’t your place to expect that information from her, regardless of how close y’all are.. YTA
Seems wrong not to send a text to ask how you’re doing, so why don’t you send a text? Why’s he’s gotta be the one reaching out when you’re the one having outbursts?
He’s not asking, he’s demanding. That’s the messed up part. It’s one thing to ask your partner if they might ever be interested in that, and quite another to tell them they’d better agree to it or you’re done.
Nah nah, no attitude from me all love. I’m just sourcing Oli ions since I don’t have to many IRL ppl to talk about this. I haven’t been stringing her along. I stated in the beginning that I’ve always had self doubt with upholding relationships and that if she ever dealt the need to leave me or if I wasn’t good enough that I understood. I don’t want to waste anyone’s time
I ain't your bro, miss “I accept free stuff from men and all I can think of is how to get more cash thus I keep accusing other people of what I usually do”.
Your shenanigans are in your comments as well, don't think people can't read them.
That would be hot for me too—especially if money was actually an issue.
I (44F) make a lot more than my partner. As such, I pay a lot more of the shared bills. But he works full time, just not in a lucrative field, so it doesn’t bother me. He’s fiscally responsible and we aren’t struggling for money.
To me, it’s more about work ethic and character than just money. It sounds like your BF is the type who does the bare minimum. Which would be fine if he were actually financially secure—not everyone is career driven—but he’s not. And he’s 33! This is it babe, this is who he is. An 18YO in a 33YO’s body.
It would be a dealbreaker for me. I was married to someone who was fiscally irresponsible and it really set me back. Made sure not to make that mistake again.
Okay so I try not to assume this sub has a gender bias…but if a guy made a post here about him and his gf having a mutual breakup, her seeing/hooking up with other people, getting back together with her, some random creep who can't accept that she's moved on and she has blocked sends him revenge porn of her, and he was focused solely on his own feelings because he couldn't fathom that if you break up with someone that you are no longer exclusive at that time even if you later get back together rather than the whole YOUR PARTNER HAS A STALKER SHARING REVENGE PORN OF THEM
I really have to wonder if the comments would be as passive about that fact or as compassionate to OP rather than telling them “your partner is the victim in this, they have done nothing wrong and you are making a serious problem they are dealing with about you”
I'm just concerned about the man's hormones if he's polishing the bishop that often every damn night. If he's that oversexed, and you two have a healthy sexual relationship, I sense a serious mismatch in sex drives that is going to be a problem far sooner than later. Y'all might want to explore that, since if it's not addressed, you two won't be sharing a bed much longer and your sleep problem fixes itself.
If you don't have a good sexual relationship and he needs to paint the ceiling twice a night, well, that's a whole other post.
Yeah, no more chances. She doesn’t like you or care about you she just doesn’t wanna get dumped. Get far away and maybe she’ll learn a lesson about how to treat people
Not acknowledging your unhealthy dependence on your adult brother is not “refusing to be there” for you. It's just not entertaining your unhealthy dependence.
I couldn't recover from that. That's a deal breaker for me. Fantasizing about a threesome and fantasizing about fucking one of your friends are totally diverse.
Honestly I would just tend to my mother in this case and ignore him until after. Take your time preparing for the split and doing things like selling off mutual property, whatever it takes so that as soon as she passes I could turn to him and say “It's over, get out of my life, if I see you again I'll destroy you”
I won't. Go with “I'm thinking I'd really want to kiss you”. Because that's a safe one.
“May I kiss you”. Might come off really sweet but under circumstances might also come off a bit weird.
Only say “May I kiss you” as a triviality when you're absolutely sure she wants a kiss.
You really look down on him. You need to pull your head out of the clouds, and put your feet firmly back on the ground. Work on yourself, sort your shit out!!
She is aware of our relationship
Yikes. You might want to demand he take an STD test
Sounds like he was too tired or something, but girl… train them up if you're not getting to your O. ?
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There's this saying in Africa “Everything that happens in a household was known to the spouses during the engagement, but the spouses did not attach too much importance to it.”
First sorry abou the truama you went through, but it sounds like your fiance does actually care for sex in a relationship and is frustrated that your relationship has no become you two being loving roommates. Not being on the same page regarding sex can be a big deal, it does end relationships/engagements/marriages, sounds like this is the case here, you want to be more like roommates and he wants a physical relationship, neither wrong but its probably not gonna work
7 firdt months were like too good to be true… Because they weren't true. You just never caught up her lies before
And by go, to clarify: it should be euthanized.
Rehoming a dog that behaved this way is irresponsible and quite frankly will probably only make things worse.
There is probably a 1% chance that this dog ends up with the right new home with 0 interactions with other animals or children and with someone who can try to work with it.
The risks are too high.
I'm curious… How does she know what you're up to with your Dad and his AP? How is she able to “see” y'all being happy together? Is everyone talking about these interactions around her? Posting for her to see? (You can restrict things from being seen by certain people on sites like facebook…)
I can imagine how things might seem from her perspective… She was the one betrayed, but she likely feels he has been rewarded and left unscathed by his selfish indiscretions. That no one cares what he did to her. And if those people don't care, then she probably thinks they're likely to hurt her the same way, so she wants them to choose HER… Or leave her on her terms…
Therapy would be in her best interest to help her process her grief and pursue what is best for her… But her feelings, hurt, distrust and resentment isn't unfounded. Betrayal like that cuts DEEP.
It is good you're able to forgive your father. But do keep in mind that if he is willing and able to hurt someone as close to him as his WIFE and mother of his son for his own satisfaction, he is willing and able to do so to you too if he feels the benefit will be satisfactory enough to risk it. And his new AP, if she is willing to wreck a marriage, she isn't a good person to put a lot of faith in either as she also is willing to intentionally deeply hurt others for her benefit.
Id look for my own piece of mind…
Because I assume that OP cares about their partner as more than a sex partner, and would like to keep things as amicable and kind as possible.
it absolutely wasn’t her place to tell and it definitely wasn’t your place to expect that information from her, regardless of how close y’all are.. YTA
Seems wrong not to send a text to ask how you’re doing, so why don’t you send a text? Why’s he’s gotta be the one reaching out when you’re the one having outbursts?
In theory they can compel you to testify, but if you sit there and cry when they ask questions there’s not much they can do.
He’s not asking, he’s demanding. That’s the messed up part. It’s one thing to ask your partner if they might ever be interested in that, and quite another to tell them they’d better agree to it or you’re done.
There's been a ton of cheating fantasy trolls lately.
Lose the weight…aka break up with the dead weight..aka ditch the d-bag.
Nah nah, no attitude from me all love. I’m just sourcing Oli ions since I don’t have to many IRL ppl to talk about this. I haven’t been stringing her along. I stated in the beginning that I’ve always had self doubt with upholding relationships and that if she ever dealt the need to leave me or if I wasn’t good enough that I understood. I don’t want to waste anyone’s time
That’s true poetry, right there!
I ain't your bro, miss “I accept free stuff from men and all I can think of is how to get more cash thus I keep accusing other people of what I usually do”.
Your shenanigans are in your comments as well, don't think people can't read them.
That would be hot for me too—especially if money was actually an issue.
I (44F) make a lot more than my partner. As such, I pay a lot more of the shared bills. But he works full time, just not in a lucrative field, so it doesn’t bother me. He’s fiscally responsible and we aren’t struggling for money.
To me, it’s more about work ethic and character than just money. It sounds like your BF is the type who does the bare minimum. Which would be fine if he were actually financially secure—not everyone is career driven—but he’s not. And he’s 33! This is it babe, this is who he is. An 18YO in a 33YO’s body.
It would be a dealbreaker for me. I was married to someone who was fiscally irresponsible and it really set me back. Made sure not to make that mistake again.
Okay so I try not to assume this sub has a gender bias…but if a guy made a post here about him and his gf having a mutual breakup, her seeing/hooking up with other people, getting back together with her, some random creep who can't accept that she's moved on and she has blocked sends him revenge porn of her, and he was focused solely on his own feelings because he couldn't fathom that if you break up with someone that you are no longer exclusive at that time even if you later get back together rather than the whole YOUR PARTNER HAS A STALKER SHARING REVENGE PORN OF THEM
I really have to wonder if the comments would be as passive about that fact or as compassionate to OP rather than telling them “your partner is the victim in this, they have done nothing wrong and you are making a serious problem they are dealing with about you”
I do think I should and I will hopefully. thank you!
AWK-ward.
This goes way beyond sleep habits.
I'm just concerned about the man's hormones if he's polishing the bishop that often every damn night. If he's that oversexed, and you two have a healthy sexual relationship, I sense a serious mismatch in sex drives that is going to be a problem far sooner than later. Y'all might want to explore that, since if it's not addressed, you two won't be sharing a bed much longer and your sleep problem fixes itself.
If you don't have a good sexual relationship and he needs to paint the ceiling twice a night, well, that's a whole other post.
What are you asking for advice on?
Tell him to look up videos on dog training.
meh i just said mental health issues i think telling her that i like her would stress her out during exams ?
anyways thanks!! have goodluck too!
Yeah, no more chances. She doesn’t like you or care about you she just doesn’t wanna get dumped. Get far away and maybe she’ll learn a lesson about how to treat people
Not acknowledging your unhealthy dependence on your adult brother is not “refusing to be there” for you. It's just not entertaining your unhealthy dependence.
You want her to know? Tell her. Tell her, hold her, kiss her, love on her. That'll be more than enough for her.
“Please tell me about veganism and your reasons for being vegan” -no one
I couldn't recover from that. That's a deal breaker for me. Fantasizing about a threesome and fantasizing about fucking one of your friends are totally diverse.
Honestly I would just tend to my mother in this case and ignore him until after. Take your time preparing for the split and doing things like selling off mutual property, whatever it takes so that as soon as she passes I could turn to him and say “It's over, get out of my life, if I see you again I'll destroy you”