That is important information to contain in the lead. It changes the way the situation should be handled. BUT, it does not change his culpability here.
You need to TELL him that you WILL be paying him the $4000 and he WILL be signing the title over to you because he does NOT get equal access to a car that you paid not only 2/3 for but likely considerably more since that $4000 came out of a joint account. I would also highly suggest you use this situation as a rock solid indicator that:
1 – he does not view you as his equal
2 – he does not respect you as a parent, a woman or his equal partner
3 – he will throw his weight around to get what he wants so long as it benefits him and his and does not give a rip about your son.
4 – I stand by his daughters are spoiled. A high functioning neurodivergent child DOES understand responsibility and consequences. THey understand black and white. The agreement was simple and VERY fair. They wake him up, he drives them. They don't wake him up, they take the bus. They didn't wake him up and broke the agreement, thus they lost the priviledge or rides because they broke your son's trust.
5 – think about whether your husband treats your son like crap in other ways too because his treatment of your son and his treatment of YOUR property here is making my stomach churn.
I don't see coddling of your son. If he is getting good grades, works 2 jobs and is financially responsible for insurance and gas and has upheld his agreement, there is no coddling. What I DO see is your husband making excuses upon excuse for his piss poor behavior towards your son and I do see him coddling his daughter.
As a parent of a neurodivergent child, I get the desire to coddle her but your husband is doing her a MASSIVE disservice by not holding her responsible for her own actions in ways she can understand them and do not tell me that she didn't understand her actions had consequences. It is not a 17 year old child's responsibility to coddle another 17 year old and put up with being treated like a second class citizen in a family because step dad has a jealousy issue.
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
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It's been what? Five months? You gotta slow down and give it time. You're talking and thinking as though you've been together two years or something. At five months people are usually just getting their bearings in a relationship, even ones they've chosen to be exclusive in. Exclusivity=/=Love. Exclusivity just means they enjoy spending time with you the most out of anyone and they want to see it blossom. Please take a step back and look at this properly. Love has to grow and you can't expect it to just happen.
That is important information to contain in the lead. It changes the way the situation should be handled. BUT, it does not change his culpability here.
You need to TELL him that you WILL be paying him the $4000 and he WILL be signing the title over to you because he does NOT get equal access to a car that you paid not only 2/3 for but likely considerably more since that $4000 came out of a joint account. I would also highly suggest you use this situation as a rock solid indicator that:
1 – he does not view you as his equal
2 – he does not respect you as a parent, a woman or his equal partner
3 – he will throw his weight around to get what he wants so long as it benefits him and his and does not give a rip about your son.
4 – I stand by his daughters are spoiled. A high functioning neurodivergent child DOES understand responsibility and consequences. THey understand black and white. The agreement was simple and VERY fair. They wake him up, he drives them. They don't wake him up, they take the bus. They didn't wake him up and broke the agreement, thus they lost the priviledge or rides because they broke your son's trust.
5 – think about whether your husband treats your son like crap in other ways too because his treatment of your son and his treatment of YOUR property here is making my stomach churn.
I don't see coddling of your son. If he is getting good grades, works 2 jobs and is financially responsible for insurance and gas and has upheld his agreement, there is no coddling. What I DO see is your husband making excuses upon excuse for his piss poor behavior towards your son and I do see him coddling his daughter.
As a parent of a neurodivergent child, I get the desire to coddle her but your husband is doing her a MASSIVE disservice by not holding her responsible for her own actions in ways she can understand them and do not tell me that she didn't understand her actions had consequences. It is not a 17 year old child's responsibility to coddle another 17 year old and put up with being treated like a second class citizen in a family because step dad has a jealousy issue.
Yes!!!!! Get it done dude, and then get her out of your life! Good luck
Hello /u/Heavy_Atmosphere_448,
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It's been what? Five months? You gotta slow down and give it time. You're talking and thinking as though you've been together two years or something. At five months people are usually just getting their bearings in a relationship, even ones they've chosen to be exclusive in. Exclusivity=/=Love. Exclusivity just means they enjoy spending time with you the most out of anyone and they want to see it blossom. Please take a step back and look at this properly. Love has to grow and you can't expect it to just happen.