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Edward, 25 y.o.
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Date: October 16, 2022
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“You obviously need mental health help that I cannot provide. If you send me another message threatening to harm yourself, I will have no choice but to contact the police and/or a suicide prevention network and have them perform a welfare check on you. I suggest checking yourself into some sort of care facility if you continue to have thoughts or feelings of self-harm. I do not wish anything bad for you, but I can no longer continue to have any kind of relationship with you. Please do not contact me again going forward.”
A medication that is negatively affecting her quality of life is either the wrong medication or the wrong dose and all mental health medications should be paired with therapy – at least until she’s evened out. It does take time, but if it’s not working, it’s not working. Plenty more options out there.
That being said, you need to stop with the “antidepressants being worse than the disease” talk immediately. Seriously, cut that shit out. It’s absurd and you are not qualified to make that assessment. Not only that, you’re risking your wife having a guilt complex over taking medication and it’s only going to make it harder to zero in on what actually works.
The right medication for her will help her function while maintaining all the important parts of her personality. In my case I feel completely normal and had to realize I’d never felt it before. It’s an incredible feeling but it took years of ups and downs and trial and error.
Your concerns are valid to the health of your marriage, but understand this is a process. She might be zombied out, but it might be the first time she’s felt even functional mentally and it’s hot to let that go and consider risking trying something else when you’re finally feeling a noticiable level of relief. Express your very real concerns, but remember your role is to support her, not try solve it for her with no medical training. It never works.
Of course she hasn’t introduced you to her side piece.
Thank you for pointing out the difference.
I understand this and after reading it, I’d rather be with someone who just finds me very hot no matter what. Security is really important to me in a relationship, and no matter how much he compliments me now I will continue to feel insecure because of what he said. He can’t take it back unfortunately.
If everyone is not 100% on board before it happens, it will destroy every relationship involved.
You and husband need to sit down and discuss expectations, concerns, nude lines, safe words, etc. If you both can come to an agreement you're both comfortable with, then only then do you approach someone else and have the same discussion with them to get them on the same page also.