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1. I think, first of all you should not be having sex until you heal emotionally, you call it making love and that's clearly not what's happening since he keeps asking you to perform for him.

   He is feeling a lot of justified guilt afterall he doubted you, fully believed a woman that wanted to cheat on her husband with a friend of his over his wife. He was sleeping around (maybe to get back at you? Or out of anger instead of processing his feelings and getting to a good headspace).

   If you're horny and wants sex than by all means go for it, but it won't be making love until the relationship is rebuilt and he is the one that will have to do the work, since he damaged it so very badly. Were I to be you I would proceed with the divorce, get assets divided, custody and childsupport organised and work towards trying to rebuild the relationship as if it falls apart again you will not be so vulnerable again.

   Has he been tested for STDs?

   What has he done to earn your forgiveness? Were those things he knew you liked? Were there gestures or changes in behaviour? Has he asked what he needs to do? Has he verbally apologised admitting what he did was wrong and outline what he intends to do to change? IMO he would have to give up the power he wielded to hurt you and he may not be willing to do that as he would be the one vulnerable.

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