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gorefairy, 18 y.o.
Location: Manitoba, Canada
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Date: October 16, 2022
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With friends like these… Seriously, dump the husband and your friend and start afresh. There’s too much toxicity and lies here.
I’m sorry you’re going through this. If you knew in advance that things were going to be like this forever, would you still want to be married to him?
Have you tried taking with him about this mat a time when you weren’t trying to be flirty/spontaneous? I think trying that would relieve a lot of pressure from both of you. Try talking about how it’s making you feel. Ask for his help in coming to a solution.
Counseling can help with this. And….if you knew in advance thst it’s always going to be like this, what would you do?
If she was in a car accident tomorrow or suffered some god awful accident you’d have no legal right to find her, be with her, and make decisions for her. Not getting married because of a statistic is telling her she’s nothing but a number to you. Your relationship is between you and her. Not every other couple in the world. Not the failed marriages you’ve seen or heard about. Not anything but you and her. I say this gently, but your excuses are just that. You’re entitled to them and you certainly shouldn’t marry because you feel like you have to or for any reason other than wanting to, but this is a full on bullshit cop out. Don’t be a coward. Either you want to spend your life with her or you don’t. If she’s not worth getting married and taking that chance. Tell her. She deserves everything she wishes for in life just like you. Personally, I think you’re scared and don’t want to be told what to do. No one can force you down an aisle.