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Honey and Bear, 30 y.o.
Location: Daniel Boone National Forest
Room subject: Saturday Beverage Review!! Good Vibes and Sexy Times!! Tip Menu Active — HnB
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On-line Live Sex Chat rooms Honey and Bear
Date: October 9, 2022
It’s never the wrong time for learning
Yikes
This is abuse. I see the pillow that he threw at you changing to something much more dangerous the next time you “mess up”. No one should treat you this way, especially for an accident! Please, get out now, before he gets even worse. I’ve been there, don’t let the fear of being alone overshadow your health and safety. ❤️❤️
That’s my favorite line. “ good luck in your future endeavors”
I'd just make sure to try and set out pillows so when this marriage spits her out like a peach pit. There relationship will implode. It will get bad… i mean really bad. Advenually she will leave him or he will get caught cheating or both. I would litterally tell her ” remember when this marriage ends badly I'll be there for you” and just leave it at that. I would focus on making sure she knows she has options. That she's not trapped. That when she finally hits her limit your help to pick up the pieces.
I'm a female Unless he has missed some serious details (like having 3 kids and 15 pets -of his – to care for…) She really-just obviously- doesnt work. I mean what single person doesnt want to get thier own money??? Especially if she just gets to keep it????? Think on that. IF she had a job she could obviously just buy whatever she wants. Because u don't require anything. But she still has no job at all???
So…either she is dreaming of gold digging (there are books on it. Man I didn't see it coming, but my own BFF gave me one …. Teaches you how to train (groom)your promising young man to keep you properly.. encouraging him to excel.. and that'd your “job” …..To be the woman behind the man … although they suggest older men that are established.
See!! She needs a book to realize she is doing it all wrong.. Maybe get one sent to the house (anon)
If it bothers you so much, it's because you still love him and secretly hope hat he's back for you…
Don't respond, block him, move on.
Drop the girl, keep the dog. That threat is pretty disgusting.
He sounds like a bully. I wouldn’t interact with him.
Last time I went with the flow with a guy that refused to tell me more about his parents (or meet them) and kept hiding stuff from me, turned out that everything he told me was a lie, and I discovered it after we were living together already.
Never talked about killing animals. It is very cruel to kill any animal except medically euthanising them recommended by a veterinarian. Rehoming is not killing an animal.
So she sent you two pics of her and her boyfriend and you feel she’s rubbing your face in the relationship? Maybe I’m missing something that you didn’t mention? I just don’t see how a couple of pictures of her boyfriend have upset you so much? I agree with the person who said she’s probably just excited she met someone and thought that she could share her excitement with you – as the friend you supposedly are.
Tbh, if you’re feeling this way after a couple of mentions, maybe it’s better if you do get some space from your friendship.
Just tell him how you feel, my money is on he loves you too, and he is scare to tell you for the same reasons you have.
You said in another post He has broken up with past girlfriends, because the want him to distance him self from you and your kids, he has chosen you over several girls, he is in love with you.
IF this post is even real why won't you take the advice of others? It's as if you don't even care or have any forms of love/respect for yourself. If you wanna stay with your RACIST boyfriend because he's SUPER VERY HOT & you LOVE HIM then cheers to you I guess. Keep him and be together forever. At least somewhere in the world 2 people wouldn't have to deal with either of you.
Thank you !!!
I believe that OP put most of the money that he inherited into a college fund for his daughter, not the money that his son inherited.
Since your posting this all over….
How do you think she would react? Do you think it would be a negative or positive response?
How long have you been together? Is outright sex an option?
Should I text her cell directly or give her the option to text my cell?
Bro… go with your gut on this one.
Who cares? Why do you?
Geez.
Hoes do as hoes do. If she's not like that then she should stop behaving like one for once.
It's been 3 months since the breakup. We dont really talk anymore. I understand why. I can tell you she doesn't love me anymore.
One of the cases where I’d say get pregnant. If he doesn’t like it, he can leave. He has put every single load on you. If he loves you, he’ll stick by around. If not, best to know now.
bye?
What do you value more, the relationship that was or sex? This isn’t me judging it’s something you have to decide for yourself. Is getting sweaty and sharing various fluids and gasses worth the potential heartache?
Yeah but we haven’t labeled it
You're getting a lot of comments which are piling on about the mistake you made, which you have acknowledged.
What I don't see is anybody telling you that your marriage was just attacked. Abusers isolate their victims from the victim's support network. That's very important to keep the victim vulnerable.
I think it's really important for you to understand how and why you made this mistake, and then to demonstrate to your fiancé that you are learning and what you are learning.
It sounds like you are a generally good person who has not had a lot of experience with manipulative, narcissistic, or abusive people.
You naively assumed that his mother was acting in good faith and speaking honestly when she reached out to you. Not everybody is acting in good faith, and not everybody is honest.
If you continue to believe that everybody is honest and acting in good faith, you are setting yourself up for a lot of different mistakes in life. That makes you the perfect mark for a con artist, among numerous other routes of attack on you or your marriage.
It is entirely possible that his mom chose you as her route of attack because breaking you two up, as a predictable outcome, reduces the strength of your fiancé's support network.
My mom is also a teenage mom, although she made a lot of mistakes, she loves me, and I just can't imagine cutting her off.
This is called projection. You understandably took your feelings about and empathy for your mother, and projected them onto him and his mother.
You could have taken the opposite approach. Imagine how badly your mother would have had to mistreat you in order for you to cut her off. That may be impossible to imagine because it fails to be realistic with your mental model of your mom – but remember that your fiancé had the same feelings of love for his mother when he was a little boy. She had to fail him terribly and repeatedly in order for him to reach cutting her off.
In order to become a “safe person” for your fiancé again, you need to learn and understand manipulative techniques so that you can recognize them when they are deployed against you.
I found the website Out Of The Fog excellent for learning to recognize manipulative techniques. Many of them are listed on this page: https://outofthefog.website/traits
You should take a look at them and see how many you recognize in his mother from your interactions with her. If you'll take that as homework, here's the list of seven I spotted clearly as an answer key: Triangulation, Stalking, Harassment, Sabotage, Self-Victimization, Hoovering, and Manipulation with possible indicators for nine more: Alienation, Imposed Isolation, Dependency, Engulfment, Baiting, Mirroring, Selective Memory, Denial, and Gaslighting.
I would also recommend that you learn a lot about trauma in order to become a trauma-informed partner. That will, ultimately, make you a better person and a better partner, and equipped to handle it when he has “unpredictable” responses to stimuli.
He may, for example, appear to “overreact” to relatively routine things, and understanding that that is a response to childhood trauma rather than to the routine thing in the moment will help you to not take it personally and be an excellent and safe partner for someone who is healing.
There are a number of books on the subject; from your story I suspect that Pete Walker's CPTSD: From Surviving to Thriving is the most relevant, but you might prefer something that's more in the line of a couple's guide or guide for the partner; I don't have a recommendation.
My final suggestion is that you request couple's counseling as a safe venue to talk discuss it and hear what he needs. In the first session, I think you start by telling your fiancé and the counselor that you realize just how badly you've fucked up. /u/Exotic_Weather_441's comment is the place to take notes from in preparing what to say. You need to own each of those mistakes.
Then, the only way you will regain his trust and forgiveness, is to listen to him and believe what he tells you.
Breaks are often breakups with training wheels. But do consider that your boyfriend probably isn't a therapist or professional counselor. So he can't be the one you go to with anxiety and all your problems. Maybe you don't need a licensed psychologist but you do at least need a few friends you can dump your stuff onto so your boyfriend doesn't feel like he singlehandedly has the responsibility for your bad emotional days. So if you do take this break make part of it telling him that you understand you've maybe leaned on him too much and in the future you'll try not to do that anymore. Good luck