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Date: October 14, 2022
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Speak to a lawyer immediately. You may have a lot of recourse
No of course it’s not to fix the uncle. It’s to show how illegal and hurtful it is too the whole family
There's a lot about this post that's unusual.
You were not partners. You were two teenagers who were dating. And the relationship has now run its course which is healthy and normal. In the future at this age just keep things casual. There's no need to feel the pressure to have a partner at your age or to make major life decisions based on another person. This is the time of your life to be selfish and focus on you like your ex is doing. Good luck.
Loving someone with BPD is not a commitment to insanity and it's unhelpful to everyone to state that as a fact
That’s what I will do!
I think your comment is the most real. Thank you. I was really stupid to let myself get close to someone in that way. I broke an emotional barrier. Even though I deeply regret what happened it didn’t start against my own will. Even though it wasn’t the purpose of me drinking I used it as an excuse to do something incredibly stupid and selfish.
It’s almost like they trusted him like you did…
He’s the problem, not them.
Plot twist : she was standing right by the trash can
That’s way too much drama for such a short relationship. Move on.
Just looking for any advice
As a 35M, tits is tits.
Not too worried about it. Boobs aren't the amazement park they used to be. In fact, you can go topless anywhere in Minnesota with no problem. At a certain age, it matters much less.
That said, your friend is totally trying to steal your man. That relationship is toxic. Do you always deserve the leftovers from someone else in your life? No. You don't settle for scraps from your “friends”. This is your man. Stand your ground. Tell her to fuck off. Doesn't matter if she was drunk. Boundaries need to be enforced.
he is an awful person and i’m sorry you have been through this. please dump him and block him on everything, he doesn’t deserve another second of your attention
Finalise what decision?
its a post, kinda weird but theres more to people then profiles n posts.
It is not fake sadly.
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There is absolutely nothing to be gained here by you forcing a paternity test. You will rip that baby's life apart and I can guarantee that there will be a massive cost to everyone except for you.
All I'm reading is my baby and my rights and my kid. Like do you see him as anything other than an object that you think might belong to you? He has a happy life now with his mom and dad and you want to ruin that just because you can. What do you have to offer him that he doesn't already have? He has a secure, loving, happy 2 parent household and you want to take all that away and make him a kid with 2 homes who never really belongs in either house. If you actually were a parent, who knew what it was like to love their child, you wouldn't do that.
So you want all the benefits of a committed relationship with out any of the responsibilities? How nice! Stop stringing her along and tell her you don’t ever want to get married.
That’s because it’s not true. Genetics, particularly recessive genes, don’t work that way. At all.
Nope
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Yes well done Reddit. Let's call the nuclear option. It always solves everything. ?
Either you communicate clearer and explain what’s going to happen if she don’t at least try and not be a selfish lover or you break up. If you break up though make sure she knows why.
I understand your culture and similar. Using any amount of justification to continue to online in that racist and judgmental world is disgraceful.
She is an adult. Let her be her own person and date whoever she wants. By shaming her and telling your parents they could force her to leave and then you may never have her in your life.
Hating people simply because of the color of their skin, their country of origin, or their religion is disgusting and it’s time to open your mind and your heart. People are people.
100 percent on you.
Do not tell the kids why. The only reason you'd tell adult children are to turn the kids against the other parent.
Don't do that to children. It fucks them up. Marriage issues should be kept between the people in the marriage.
I didn't attack you. I responded with my opinion. Which hasn't changed.
Look up limerence on Wikipedia. This is not “the one” you are experiencing limerence
It's sad that you're trying to derail the conversation by going that route instead of being open to discussion. It cheapens you and doesn't do you justice.
If you want to preserve your friendship with your best friend stop fucking his sister, especially since she wants to keep it a secret
Ridiculous. If people wanted an echo chamber why bother posting?
I mean it‘s more 50/50. When he plays video games he‘s together with his friends. But he also finds time for me. I think it‘s unhealthy and it would be better for him to meet his friends in real life but they prefer meeting over chat.
“Baby days coming to an end” isn't just about fertility. She could be realizing that she's getting older and doesn't want to be “too old” and going through a pregnancy, or dealing with the sleepless newborn stage, etc.
To say age doesn't matter is the ignorant statement.
Heeeeey, your bf is not nice. I think if you really think about it you could probably come up with more than one way he has tried to change or control you. I deeply love my bf, and he loves me deeply as well. I don't like some things about him, and he doesn't like some things about me. We're both human, so neither of us are perfect, or even perfectly consistent in our imperfections. Your bf is trying to force you to change, holding out the carrot of his “love” while beating you with the stick of “not good enough”. Someone who loves you may wish you'd change a habit, but they will love you exactly as you are. Don't settle for less than being loved exactly as you are.
1) Find a new job 2) Call the police
Well that's relationship probably over before it began.
You should be completely honest with her. It's better to break up than be with someone whom you don't want to be with, otherwise, you'll always have regrets
I don't know how your getting down voted for this
I know why. Relationship subreddits have many double standards and weird, unrealistic ideas about how relationships should work.
I knew someone would say something about the snooping which I honestly am so ashamed that I did. We’ve been together for over a yr, I’ve never done it before and I’ll never do it again. Plus it truly wasn’t my intention starting off. I told him all of this and he wasn’t upset he knows me, I’m not controlling and honestly really laid back this was very out of character for me tbh I really shouldn’t explain myself but sometime a girl just has anxiety lol
I mean do you really need us to spell this one out for you broski? She's checked out and is enjoying all the perks of a single life while keeping you in her back pocket in case it doesn't work out.
If she always has her phone on her and responds immediately to the random guys that message then you just aren't a priority. You're a backup. My advice is to leave.
Well we did go up a size cause the standard didn't fit… This one fits better, I think.
here we are on reddit all over thinking what EVERYTHING means
Here we are on reddit where some of us actually take jokes about violence against women seriously, since jokes about such are part of why violence and harassment against women are so often normalized, tolerated, and even condoned in many locations, in addition to not taken nearly as seriously as it should be.
I mean he's literally bullying you. You need to confront the fact that your partner is *intentionally trying to hurt you* and destroy your self-esteem. It's completely inexcusable behavior coming from a complete stranger, but from your PARTNER?!
Please respect yourself and dump this piece of garbage.
With my immediate family yes, although it hasn’t been particularly good for a few years now.
His coworker is being inappropriate. He needs to make it clear that he is not going to discuss anything not work related with her.
“My marriage is not a topic I'm going to discuss. Is there anything work related you need to talk about?”
At these work events he can excuse you both from sitting next to her. “Excuse us. We're going to mingle” or “I see John over there. I need to talk to him. Excuse us.”
So I'm bisexual (33F). My best friend is a lesbian. We hang out, tell each other everything have an awesome friendship. Never once have we even come close to crossing the line and disrespecting my husband despite the fact we could technically be into each other. Your wife emotionally cheated homie. This wasn't just a 'friend' thing. She knows it. You know it. She admitted to it. It's up to you to decide if you want to work through it but emotional cheating is still cheating
OK so do share that with the attorney but I don't think it is going to be particularly helpful. I do not agree with what he is doing but it does not sound like it will rise to the level of abuse.
I think a lot of people are concerned because this post is not about a debate on when in the day to shower. Not really. It almost sounds like another power play event in a chain of events wherein your boyfriend makes personal decisions on your behalf.
It sounds like you have changed a lot over the course of your relationship due to his preferences.
Additionally, his comments about what he expects of you “as a woman” provide evidence to him having different requirements for men and women which is inherently sexist.
Also, a 10 year age gap is slightly concerning.
That, coupled with your admitting this is your first long term relationship, make for the perfect storm for an abusive relationship.
Often, sexist, abusive, predatory men will seek out younger, less experienced women and they will cite their age and experience as knowledge/law.
Then they convince their girlfriends that they don't know the correct way to dress, talk, eat, speak, socialize etc. as they mold impressionable women into different people who suite their needs, not necessarily caring if these changes are unfair or go against the girlfriend/wife/partner's personality or desires.
That is not to say you are definitely 100% in an abusive relationship and you are being played.
But this is to explain why the commenters are downvoting some of your comments and jumping to the concerns they've expressed here.
I'd highly recommend speaking with an impartial third party, perhaps with professional mental health training, and looking at your relationship from the outside in an attempt to ensure you are not missing something more sinister at play here.
Hahaha honestly wouldn’t doubt it at this point
@chaosenhanced This is an insightful take. Interestingly, I think it might be the other way around. One thing that he and I have talked about before — and he’s acknowledged — is the fact that he sees sex very much as a “performance,” on the part of both parties. Obviously, it always involves an element of that— but I see it more as an interaction, where you’re responding off of one another. It often felt like he wasn’t very “present” — like he had predetermined how he wanted it to go, and that’s how it went. So, now that I think about it… maybe the lack of “chemistry” was that I was looking for some kind of intimacy or connection, and maybe from his perspective, that took away from the charge of a “performance.” Like, I was looking for some kind of “merging,” whereas he wanted to retain the allure of “otherness.”
I'm going to be honest here. If it was me? You just messed up so bad I wouldn't forgive it would be 100% end of relationship. What if you do it at the wedding . When you have a child?
You fully blindsided him, knowing full well he was NC and wanted nothing to do with her. It was toxic and traumatising for him, and you just went. Oh well, I know better.
If and it's a big IF you can save this good luck. I wouldn't try to force anything else at this time. Let him decompress and work through his feelings. Also block and get rid of his mother and apologise to him. He may not even wish to listen at this time, but now you have to play it by ear and his feelings.
Let the visa expire
That’s horrible. I’m sorry you’re going through that. As someone who’s kinda in the same shoes as you, I would hate to have that happen to me. You deserve nothing but the best so do what you feel is the best for you. I really hope it gets easier for you. Take it a day at a time. There’s no rush. Also, I know you’re beautiful as you are. Scars and all (: