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1. His friends don’t appear to be your friends, so my understanding is that “the leash” is not a banter term of endearment. They’re being disrespectful. Big red flag.

   Staying out until 2AM is generally not okay if you’re living with a partner. It keeps you worried, I’m sure – especially since he’s doing drugs. Does he check in with texts during his outings? Does he let you know long in advance when to expect him? Are you okay with him being out so late? If not, have you expressed this to him? If so, what was his response?

   It seems like you put a LOT of labor into this relationship and make his high-stress days easier. Does he put in equal amount of effort? What does he do regularly to make your life easier?

   You can set boundaries without being controlling. It’s still his choice whether or not to respect those boundaries – and your choice to date someone who does or doesn’t respect you.

   The drug use is a secondary problem compared to above. Does he have a dependency? It seems to me he’s using it as a coping mechanism than pure recreation, given the stress. So definitely not good.

   I’m sure you two are in love. But I’ll tell you this firmly: it takes more than love to make a relationship last. You can love someone that makes you feel miserable and alone. But why would you want to? Seemed like you two need to have a serious conversation about the dynamics of your relationship and what the future holds.

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