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You need to tell his wife. Your wife is disgusting.. fucking him in his home with his children there. Worse than dirt. I will refrain from name calling, but I wouldn’t be able to even look at her without disgust. You want to reconcile with that? I don’t understand.
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
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We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
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If you don't cut him out now, you WILL repeat this in the future. You will pine, you won't get over him, you will be miserable. I suspect your exes definitely felt your attraction for and love for Clark.
It sucks ass, but he's taken. If you really love him, you need to let him go. As you are right now, you will only hurt him and your relationship with him.
Maybe in a few years when you've chilled out and IN EARNEST moved on, you can reconnect. You might not even want to by then.
What you did, I'm not sure what you were expecting the outcome to be. This is the sort of stuff you tell a therapist. There is no way in which this was going to go well, and eventually your frustration spilled over.
I know you don't want to think about Shay, but imagine you were her. Imagine he was your husband, had taken vows, and a close mutual friend tells him “hey, I actually have feelings for you.” You'd be devastated and also obviously WILDLY cautious about seeing that friend again.
This has changed your relationship with them irrevocably, and while I don't know your intentions for sure, I think ultimately this is for the best. You need to get out of his life, get your own, move on and move forward. You can't keep living this sad, peripheral life to him where you secretly hope he drops Shay, where you self sabotage and kill your own relationships without even giving them a fair shot. Seriously, send them, on the same text, a SHORT but sincere, very high level apology, acknowledging it was a moment of high emotion for you, and that out of respect for them and to recalibrate yourself, you need to take space. Wish them well.
Then DELETE their numbers. Delete their address from your gps. Delete their emails, sent messages, block on socials. You will stalk them otherwise. You know you will.
Occupy your time with THERAPY, joining clubs or group activities, find OTHER people to connect with.
Dude, calm down. When you're in a committed relationship, your partner may try something new. They should talk to you about it first, but if you look at everything new without prior discussion as SA, then you might as well get an agreement for trying anything new.
And this is coming from someone who was SAd many times as a child. I don't see my husband waking me up with something new as SA. If I say no, and he stops, it's fine. If I say no, and he continues, then we're getting into SA.
This type of thinking of needing prior consent for EVERYTHING is what's making some people, such as men, not want to even ask a woman out for fear of being labeled as a creep or worse. Women will even record themselves being looked at at the gym and post it live like it's assault. It's absolutely asinine.
I'm so glad I'm not dating nowadays. I would not want to be asked for consent on every detail of my relationship. You just need to understand the word “no” and body language (such a hand pushing you away) and its good.
Oh I know it sucks..I’ve just been trying my best to keep this relationship going but it’s just not working out..more and more things keep coming up about him..and now I’ve lost all trust that I don’t feel comfortable getting intimate with him..and I just wanna end it but I’m scared that he’s gonna start harassing me and my family.
He brings absolutely nothing to the table. I think he is actively doing what he can to be gross and mean to you.
Please dump him and stop going crazy on your poor hoo. A shower with water (if you really feel like using soap, Love Wellness has a nice pH balancing cleanser I use occasionally), and clean cotton undies are enough to keep everything how it should be.
Oh I'm gonna twist myself up. Feel like my heart could fall out of my chest. I don't think she would do that to me. I know anything is a possibility, but really she is the most faithful girl I've ever met.
He ordered it from a private seller live to my house and he is the one with the receipt, is it possible to return that way?
You're young. Get a new one
o what did he say??
Hello /u/plumcactus,
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You need to tell his wife. Your wife is disgusting.. fucking him in his home with his children there. Worse than dirt. I will refrain from name calling, but I wouldn’t be able to even look at her without disgust. You want to reconcile with that? I don’t understand.
Hello /u/pinacolammas,
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Therapist and find new friends.
If you don't cut him out now, you WILL repeat this in the future. You will pine, you won't get over him, you will be miserable. I suspect your exes definitely felt your attraction for and love for Clark.
It sucks ass, but he's taken. If you really love him, you need to let him go. As you are right now, you will only hurt him and your relationship with him.
Maybe in a few years when you've chilled out and IN EARNEST moved on, you can reconnect. You might not even want to by then.
What you did, I'm not sure what you were expecting the outcome to be. This is the sort of stuff you tell a therapist. There is no way in which this was going to go well, and eventually your frustration spilled over.
I know you don't want to think about Shay, but imagine you were her. Imagine he was your husband, had taken vows, and a close mutual friend tells him “hey, I actually have feelings for you.” You'd be devastated and also obviously WILDLY cautious about seeing that friend again.
This has changed your relationship with them irrevocably, and while I don't know your intentions for sure, I think ultimately this is for the best. You need to get out of his life, get your own, move on and move forward. You can't keep living this sad, peripheral life to him where you secretly hope he drops Shay, where you self sabotage and kill your own relationships without even giving them a fair shot. Seriously, send them, on the same text, a SHORT but sincere, very high level apology, acknowledging it was a moment of high emotion for you, and that out of respect for them and to recalibrate yourself, you need to take space. Wish them well.
Then DELETE their numbers. Delete their address from your gps. Delete their emails, sent messages, block on socials. You will stalk them otherwise. You know you will.
Occupy your time with THERAPY, joining clubs or group activities, find OTHER people to connect with.
Eh I disagree it’s more then that…
Dude, calm down. When you're in a committed relationship, your partner may try something new. They should talk to you about it first, but if you look at everything new without prior discussion as SA, then you might as well get an agreement for trying anything new.
And this is coming from someone who was SAd many times as a child. I don't see my husband waking me up with something new as SA. If I say no, and he stops, it's fine. If I say no, and he continues, then we're getting into SA.
This type of thinking of needing prior consent for EVERYTHING is what's making some people, such as men, not want to even ask a woman out for fear of being labeled as a creep or worse. Women will even record themselves being looked at at the gym and post it live like it's assault. It's absolutely asinine.
I'm so glad I'm not dating nowadays. I would not want to be asked for consent on every detail of my relationship. You just need to understand the word “no” and body language (such a hand pushing you away) and its good.
Eww. Tell your GF. How much worse would it be if her mom tells her some skewed version of the event?
Oh I know it sucks..I’ve just been trying my best to keep this relationship going but it’s just not working out..more and more things keep coming up about him..and now I’ve lost all trust that I don’t feel comfortable getting intimate with him..and I just wanna end it but I’m scared that he’s gonna start harassing me and my family.
Vasectomies are not 100% reversible.
After 5 years, it isn't anywhere near 100%.
run.
Oh my god just dump him.
He brings absolutely nothing to the table. I think he is actively doing what he can to be gross and mean to you.
Please dump him and stop going crazy on your poor hoo. A shower with water (if you really feel like using soap, Love Wellness has a nice pH balancing cleanser I use occasionally), and clean cotton undies are enough to keep everything how it should be.
Oh I'm gonna twist myself up. Feel like my heart could fall out of my chest. I don't think she would do that to me. I know anything is a possibility, but really she is the most faithful girl I've ever met.
It is certainly possible. Why are you making excuses for her behavior?