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Mari, 27 y.o.
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Date: October 12, 2022
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Stop talking to your friends wives. If you want female friends then make female friends.
This guy needs his hard-drive checking asap this is just what he’s been caught doing, probably the tip of the iceberg
When a loved one goes through something traumatic, I feel like any good partner would strive to give them what they need and help them in the way they want to be helped. Not sure his lack of engagement and active concern can be reduced to ‘men talk less’… in fact I think you’re doing many men a great disservice there. OP’s partner has failed to support them in the way they need, simple as, and sadly doesn’t even seem to feel bad about it or be making an effort to change.
Oh god, masculine and feminine energy bs has entered the chat. You’ve got some recommendations on which crystals to carry in his pockets to balance his energy too? Smh
This is terrible advice.
Sorry if I've mis-understood but from what you said you're standing aside from them while they talk. Honestly I don't think you are invited to participate in these conversations between your girlfriend and people she knows. What makes you think you can “decline the conversation invites” on behalf of your girlfriend? Isn't she allowed to talk to anybody she wants?
Women who receive pleasure from sex and loads of non sexual affection tend to be more excited to be intimate with their partner. Most of my friends agree that sex without satisfaction become pointless chore. Also, many women do not voice lack of satisfaction in order to preserve their partner’s feelings. Perhaps instead of throwing away your relationship you two can explore what she needs to help her match y your needs.
But your knee jerk reaction was, “am I not enough for you?” Then you searched his bank records to find out how long he’d been taking it and made a public post about the issue.
Maybe he doesn’t trust you with something so personal and frankly humiliating as this, when you react like that.
upon which she proceeded to control all of his interactions
I agree his wife was unwise to marry him, but telling him she won't stick around if he contacts his affair partner or those who hid his affair is perfectly reasonable. Ideally, she'd leave this cheating POS, but her conditions for staying are completely appropriate and not controlling in the slightest.
Stop seeing him and find someone better. Next time he tries to contact you just brag how your new lover has bigger pee pee. ?
No, but unless you tested the children you have with your wife to be sure they're yours, how would you know which kid(s) aren't yours if the sibling test shows that they aren't related? Like, maybe none of the kids are yours, maybe some are, maybe all are, but a test that only tells you if they're siblings won't show which ones are yours.
I also don't think you understand how DNA and genetics work if you think a mixed kid can't be blond haired and blue eyed…
I dont see how it would even be okay for her friends to have that pic, to use that pic and so on.
I'd have a firm talk with your gf about this.
ugh i hate men right now
Declutter… Get rid of unnecessary things.
dogs are truly innocent and will love you unconditionally, like a child
people hurt and manipulate people, even subconsciously. that is indeed universal
If he already cheated and lied about it, he probably do it again.
Nope, you’re very wrong. 2 dress sizes would be going from a size 2 to a size 6. However, sizes like S or XL encompass a whole range of “dress sizes”. A woman who wears XL on average weighs 165-200 pounds. A woman who wears a 3x on average weighs from 250-300. So it is very possible (and likely) that OP has gained close to a hundred pounds, but please, go off about misogyny.
You've never smelled his minty/bad breath or his soap/shampoo/b.o. You've never picked up his socks or washed his dishes 19 days in a row. Go for a vacation first. Love comes after the 19 days of dishes.
Same! I don’t feel so bad about mine now haha
I bought a camera lens on interest free finance for $2200 and I was the biggest burden of my life lol and that’s 1% of her debt… so I really don’t think it’s unreasonable for you to feel how daunting it is!
FYI having her uterus removed isn't going to automatically make her enjoy sex. It has an impact on hormones, oestrogen drops right down and you're effectively thrown straight into menopause. It's up to her but an IUD such as the Mirena is reportedly an effective way to manage endo fir many women.
Perhaps! I suppose we shall see in due time. Either way it’s honestly a moot point on my end. This whole post hovers somewhere just above or below utterly pointless without a ton of pertinent info that is missing.
Unless you talk to him, nothing will happen
If it's good n feel comfortable great to you. Wait till your partner finds them you'll be here too complain about your GF.
Very beautifully said!!
I'm glad you're smiling, but please…do what was suggested. Like right now if you haven't already. You need strength? Ok here…..
? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
Now.
Do it NOW.
I'm sorry, and actually felt a physical ache in my heart for you when I read this because it's so bloody familiar, but . . . take him at his word.
Whether or not the results come back positive, please understand that you have just gotten a glimpse of who your partner really is. And as horrifying as it is, a decade into what you thought was a life partnership, I hope you understand that what he was telling you is that it absolutely is NOT a partnership, or “for life”, that his love for you is very much conditional.
And you have some really serious things to consider because of this:
You are still very young. You still have a GREAT DEAL of life ahead of you. And your partner has just told you without hesitation that if anything happens to you that slows you down, or where you will require his meaningful and substantial support in life, that he will not be there for you. He will just walk away. And the truth is that no one can predict whether they will become ill or disabled, and you already have indicators that you may have health challenges even if the current ones are manageable. So you need to think, not about the time you have already spent with him, but about whether you want to invest MORE of your life into building something with a man who is already telling you that he will have no qualms about walking away from you if it gets difficult. That he will let it all fall away like a house of cards.
Let me put it a different way: I know that your partner isn't lying because he is telling you the truth I have experienced my entire adult life. I am chronically ill, and nearly every single significant relationship I had in early adulthood ended because of my illness and my partners' inability to cope with it. They would freak out over the idea of having to “take care of me” . . . which was ironic, since they could clearly see that I'd been taking care of myself for years and there was no reason to think that things would change.
TL;DR: You aren't taking anything the wrong way. Your partner is. He is assuming that if you become ill you will be a burden to him, and he's not interested in hearing reason or reality. You need to decide if you want to continue to invest in a relationship with someone who is only conditionally willing to invest in you.
I apologized to my high school friend for a racist comment that I made to her like 15 years after the fact and she really genuinely appreciated it. It opened up a really beautiful and healing conversation.
Ugh, another smelly unclean Reddit guy ??♀️
I didn’t have feelings for him, I just didn’t ever take a step back to see what I was doing. I did think he was attractive, not more than my bf and I never wanted anyone else. I wouldn’t have cheated I was just mindlessly going through life and I know that’s wrong