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Michelle (not Megan! :D), 19 y.o.
Location: German, Bremen
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On-line Live Sex Chat rooms Michelle (not Megan! :D)
Date: March 24, 2023
I get her point. She’s non-confrontational and this was easier. She told you. You shouldn’t be upset.
You can still have a normal life with him behind closed doors and cameras down. But when you are out in public put on a big smile because it's show time. If it really bothers you please talk to him about it.
I am impressed at your ability to look the reasons your son has gone no contact with you in the eye and still miss it.
Maybe start with being a better person?
I wouldn't want you to influence my children to be hateful and ignorant either.
Thanks, I guess I just learned my lesson about small lies of omission – they can definitely blow up into being a much bigger deal.
This is super lame, inexperienced and immature …. Is she 14? I would never want to be with a virgin especially not in my 30s.
Leave. It is one of the most insane relationships I have heard about. And believe me , I have met a lot of things.
Well I’m 35 and still have a hard time with my mom who despite the many issues we faced together, would have left the house/boyfriend with me after he laid hands like that. She wants absolutely nothing to do with him and so long as you’re with him she will want next to nothing to do with you who is with him, which is too bad because she probably wants to try to figure out how to connect and make an adult relationship with you….except she can’t because you’re still with him and she’s protecting herself.
You’ll have no luck while you remain with this man. It doesn’t matter how ‘well’ he treats you, in comparison to abusive men, which really makes me wonder if he does even treat you well or if you are just tolerating a situation that is alright because it’s not as bad as other experiences.
Anyways, if you want her to be your #1 you have to put her in that spot knowing you’re number 2. The boyfriend can’t be in the top two spots in your life. Brutal.
Girl the red flags are popping up like daisies here. It’s not uncommon for a partner to only start showing their ugly side after their partner is somehow “trapped” in the relationship – you’ve moved in together, got married, had a kid etc.
His attitude to this whole thing is messed the fuck up. Don’t try and negotiate or be nice about this; take back your agency and draw a very hot line. Tell him you’re not his mother, and you have no intention of being the person mainly responsible for cooking and cleaning. You both work, it doesn’t matter that you work from home. Tell him you expect him to do his share and stop criticising how you do yours, or this relationship is over. If he thinks a clean house is always better than a messy house then his dusty ass can be the one to clean it.
OP, the time to choose to give your children better is now. You haven't failed, it's not “I wanted” in the past tense yet, but you do need to make a change here.
Leave this poor man alone. If it's that big of a deal, go find someone who likes it and date them instead. You cannot force someone to like a sexual act. And trying to is really fucking gross.
She is repeatedly showing you all you are is money. She wants the good life but won't work on it herself. Really man think about it please look at how she treats and talks to or about you. She doesn't love you she loves what you provide. Divorce and rebuild without her.
OMG, she's exhausting. Just tell her to lay off the subject. Putting this much emphasis on meeting the parents and telling your entire town that you're dating is completely ridiculous.
This is an absolutely ridiculous post.
You didn't move in together, it's only been a week and you are still a high school student living at home.
Just break up with him since you don't even like him.
You are not to blame whatsoever. This is a very common manipulation tactic that abusive people use to try and guilt you back into their life. I’m proud of you for telling someone he should actually be talking to and blocking him, you’re much better off now.
I only made it a few paragraphs in and yes she is ridiculous. I have no idea how long you two have been together, but is this how you want your life to go? Time to move on.
Ah gotcha. Alright. That makes sense.
So he’s isolated you and is an AH. I would not come back when I go home in 4 weeks. Seriously is this the life you want or deserve?
You leave, wtf you doing?
If you are afraid of there being a time limit, it’s pointless to even give it one last try. He’s essentially telling you, “we need to figure this out, because I’m at the end of my rope and I don’t want to leave, but I will have to”. If you can’t get it together, quickly, call it now. This probably is hurting him a lot, guys are also capable of leaving someone they love that it isn’t working with. Just because he’s told you this doesn’t mean he’s manipulating you, it means he’s trying to get you to care that you’ll lose him.
Unfortunately, at this point, unless there’s a miracle involved, you two are unlikely going to be able to just stop and fix things. But it is possible if you’re both willing to try and put in the work.
All of his actions that you are describing are very abusive. I hope you are able to find a way to divorce/escape from this man.
Talk to her about this and try your best to make her understand your perspective. When you two do spend time together make sure it is quality, such as having “date night” once a month.
Even if its very hot to not be able to see your partner daily it is also good as it makes the relation grow, as well as growing as individuals. It belong to “adulthood”.
All of his actions that you are describing are very abusive. I hope you are able to find a way to divorce/escape from this man.
that’s a bit harsh dude but thanks for the reply
Ultimatums are manipulative and shitty.
If you don’t want to go to the gym, don’t. You can stay fit without going to the gym.
What is this really about? Because to me it’s either that he’s a controlling asshole or “fit”’is really code for “lose weight” because he’s lost attraction as you’ve gained weight or he’d prefer you to be thinner.
Either way, that’s a him problem. People aren’t projects. If he doesn’t like you as is then he needs to move on.
Don’t let this a**hole who has not intention of committing to you ever waste any more of your life or your fertile years. Leave him. You deserve better; you deserve happiness.
What is keeping you in this relationship? Everything you have said was negative. I've been in an abusive relationship and the good moments were what made me stay (intermittent reinforcement, they call it).
I understand pretty well the fear that you won't find anyone else. And I'm going to be honest with you: after all the damage this person has done to you, it may take you some time to find someone. But how are you supposed to find someone else, a person that actually treats you with the love and respect you deserve, when you are trapped in this relationship?
It may not be the same for everyone, but I've been in an abusive relationship. I know what it feels like to only have your abuser. I know you have to choose between staying in a toxic relationship and literally nothing (no partner, no one to talk to, no friends, no hobbies… The void, nothing). And something, even if it's a bad, a terrible thing, is better than nothing. Always. It's a step down. But a necessary step.
Yes, you have to get worse so you can get better.
And after that, who knows? I was pretty damn sure I'd be alone, but you may find someone else, a rebound or not. I believe you need some time to learn who you are, what you like and how to online by yourself, on your own terms. Probably some psychological help too to tackle your depression, self-esteem issues and navigate your emotions.