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  1. Legally, child custody and support can be handled in divorce court but the laws will be the same whether married or unmarried, so that's not important. If the couple hasn't bought any furniture, appliances, vehicles, or real estate during their relationship, sure, a breakup is easier. Once you've invested in shared items then suddenly you find yourself fighting over whether it matters whose money went toward paying whose car payments, who made the down payment on the home even though the other made most of the mortgage payments, etc. Dividing shared bank accounts, recourse for if the other person drains the bank account before ending the relationship, dividing long term investments, these are things that have to be dealt with in civil court if family court is not an option through divorce, and civil courts will have different rules.

    The issue isn't that a couple can't agree on who owns what, it's typically that those agreements are rarely documented in valid legal contracts and seem to go out the window in the heat of the breakup.

    I don't know any state that includes prior assets as community property. States typically give to each spouse what belonged to them before the marriage, if they didn't mix it up in marital funds, any inheritances or personal injury judgments under the same condition, and then they divide everything earned and purchased during the course of the marriage. They also adjust depending on whether one spouse sacrificed their career to support the career prospects of the other and things like that, but there are equations in the law for those too.

    Whereas if you break up and your SO drains your joint bank accounts, there's nothing a civil court will do to return that money to you, unlike in a divorce court where it will be included as an asset to be divided equally regardless of whether it's been taken out of the bank by one spouse.

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