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Been going out with my girlfriend for 6 months or so and we've never formally agreed on boundaries on the opposite gender. I'm totally ok with her having male friends and I can have female friends, but where we tend to disagree is the level of friendship we can have and how close is appropriate (emotionally and physically).
I drafted up these as boundaries (or rules) I'd like us to agree to:
- Avoid deep and emotionally intimate situations & inappropriate/intimate physical contact with the opposite gender.
- Don't prioritize an opposite-sex friend above your intimate relationship.
- Recognize that your partner cannot be everything to you and you cannot be everything to your partner.
- Keep our partners feelings in mind when making decisions.
- Do not discuss the details of your romantic relationship with a different sex friend (especially not relationship problems).
What are your thoughts? Any boundaries/rules you have found to be beneficial that I don't have here?
Edit because I feel this is unclear. I have no intention of showing her this list, I'm only using it as a way to organize my thoughts.
submitted by /u/therealdealio579
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Date: April 10, 2023
The only behavior you can ever control is your own. Easier said than done. You're perfectly within your rights to set that as a boundary you are uncomfortable with, but if he isn't listening, you need to decide how you are going to respond. You've stated that you're uncomfortable and he doesn't seem to be respecting that. Basically you have to decide if you want to continue a relationship knowing he's going to disregard something that makes you deeply uncomfortable.