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Room for live sex video chat Poojabhabi101
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Date: December 7, 2022
I’ve told her i don’t see things being this way in the next few months. Either I’m gone or she tells her “ex” and she’s agreed. So I guess subconsciously I’m waiting for that
How do they end?
It is disrespectful. You bought the tickets without talking to her first or offering to invite her. Clearly she doesn’t feel comfortable with this friend. It seems intentional what you’re doing.
So you, your friend and your brother got tickets. Did you even consider getting one for your gf or ask if she wanted to go as well because if not then you are definitely TAH
Food for thought, never outsource your happiness to one person. Your EVERYTHING is not one person.
We are talking about workplace injury insurance, not life insurance. That doesn't even make sense. Why would the insurance pay out to the non injured person if the policy is in his name? There is no way this isn't fraud. Pretty sure the insurance company would be furious and perhaps take legal action.
Absolutely…
His best friend growing up murdered his mother and he took me to the swamp she was found in and made jokes and was so de-sensitized to it
He made a comment that he hopes whoever lives in this house (that used to be a firestation) dies with her inside- said it very nonchalantly
He called himself evil person once out of nowhere back when we first started dating
The night after he broke up with me he told me he was fucked up in the head but couldn't tell me why
I found a loaded gun in his dresser drawer that I didn't know about (he claimed it was a bb gun but I showed someone the bullets and the gun and he told me that's a revolver). This was only concerning because we lived together with a young child
He had a collection of screenshots of girls he went to high school with that he would pleasure himself to..
He was very controlling over what I did and who I talked to and would time me whenever I went somewhere
I dealt with this for 2.5 years and by the end of it i was beyond depressed and a shell of myself
These are only the major concerning behaviors I witnessed
Been asking myself this question and the more I think about our friendship the answer is negative. I still wanted to hear other opinions here.
stop thinking you should be treated like a princess, relationships are a two way street and it sounds like you expect them to do all the hot work of complimenting you. if you weren't so entitled then maybe you'd have more success
Yeah it really sounds like some shitty test. OP going with his male friend is the best possible way to handle this situation
Sleep with the sister
you're communicating to all of us that you've essentially been a good for nothing burden to this man. He has been burning himself to keep you warm, and he's done doing that. You want to put the effort in only now that you've been threatened with the loss of a convenient, cushy life. Please. You dont care about him. You just want to protect the convenient life you've been living. If you really cared about your marriage, you would already have talked to him or offered to do all these things.
He deserves someone who wont take him for granted. you admitted yourself that you were being lazy. So go be lazy by yourself and leave him alone. How many men would be willing to bathe you and care for you like a parent when you were mentally unable to do it yourself?
Good luck finding someone who's willing to do that lol
Helped, probably.
Does her father believe this would be a honor killing? Is religion involved or is he just crazy? I hope you two escape him and have a happy life.
Your feelings are valid. I wouldnt even know what to do if I was in your shoes. While you raised “Sage” as your own and view him as your son, and look to him as your bio daughters brother, it doesnt mean that your daughters have ever seen him as a real brother. More like the kid that moved in and was included in everything perhaps? I hate that you were mislead after so many years, that's what is truly fucked up about it all. but they're both adults, and can legally do what they want with one another.
Jesus cracker jacks on a balloon, and I thought I had a bad one. This needs to be talked about, even if it’s indirectly saying she burned you tragically. You got this my guy. This situation going to feel like 12 fans with shit thrown at them but gotta stay strong. Fight the good fight ?
Don't be with someone you don't trust. Be with someone else who is only attracted to you.
Yeah you need to wash your ass.
???
Exactly. Unless this is what you want your children to learn is normal in intimate relationships, you need to leave. This is already harming them. How much worse do you want it to be? And if she kills you, who's going to protect your children?
I'm not sure if scrolling through social media is a sign of depression on it's own. But people do get drawn to a lot of low energy, mindless activities like watching tv.
You want to keep an eye out for sudden changes to their health and hygiene habits. They stop showering regularly or brushing their teeth. They stop eating or start eating way more. They start drinking way more or using other substances. They stop leaving their home. They stop cleaning their home.
Side note, if this is a pattern and he's on social media, maybe this is triggered by a past event? Maybe someone died, maybe someone left him, something bad may of happened and social media is causing him to reminisce.
I'd say track everything she does like when she goes and how she goes and if you get a chance try and catch her potentially doing anything I'm the act. It seems suspicious.
Im sorry this happened to you.
A long time ago, my boyfriend of a year told me he needed time to “figure himself out”. There was a lot going on within his family at the time, he was moving, and I figured he was just stressed and needed space. I said ok and we stopped seeing each other for a while. We lived pretty close to each other and his house was on a main street so if I was driving anywhere I'd go past his house. Well one day I noticed a girl getting into a car, having just come out of his house. This girl is one that I was told at one point, I had nothing to worry about. Well apparently I did because he was sleeping with her. He lied and told me he didn't. I asked her, she told me they did, then he lied about what they actually did but admitted that they did something. Anyway, I had my answer. It turns out, he left me for the sole purpose of being able to sleep with her. They were talking while we were together. He was very apologetic and I genuinely thought he was sorry and regretted it. We got back together 2 weeks later. A month later he cheated on me and broke up with me AFTER it happened.
I'm not saying your guy did it on purpose but I am saying that it is entirely possible.
Your post lacks a question. As per Rule 2, all posts must feature a question that you want specifically answering. We don't host, rants, vents, letters to other people, poetry, journal entries, hypotheticals or 'what would you do' posts, or reflections on past experiences to give other people lessons.
We are here for you to ask specific relationship issue with a current relationship you have right now, in this moment.
Honey you have to leave him alone. You opened up the relationship because you were BORED, he told you he would leave if he found someone new, and he found someone who doesn’t treat him like a backup sex doll.
What are you expecting? Things can’t just go back to normal, it’s far past that point.
You like the chase, not the prize. You’d just get bored again and the cycle would repeat.
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/s i guess
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Basically he asked her to be exclusive and she agreed otherwise she wouldn’t have told you. So now she’s in effect cheating on him with you.
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Maybe he’s been with one of your friends and not wanted more and they now have some resentment so they cockblock you know.
Ask them if they’ve been with him
Is your daughter your only child or your only daughter?
If you have other children, what are their relationships with you like?
Do you get along with your family or your husbands family?
All the above can give a better understanding of your circumstances. If this is entirely truthful, then you need to tell you husband that your daughter thinks he is an ugly old man and only good enough for his money (which she seems to have no problem accessing) and he can decide what to do with that information.
You just tell people your roommate went through all of your personal stuff when you weren't there.
Tell her not to go into you room over text message and set up a camera.
Try to only communicate with your roommate over text message.
You just tell people your roommate went through all of your personal stuff when you weren't there.
Tell her not to go into you room over text message and set up a camera.
Try to only communicate with your roommate over text message.
What if they haven't been together long enough to establish a strong foundation of trust?
Then they also haven't been together long enough to be making restrictions on each other, in my opinion. I don't think there's any point in a relationship in which you should not allow your partner to hang out with a friend, unless there's something that would actually justify that like a history of cheating.
I’m sorry, something is up with your fb, and she is irritable and being a bad friend or not a friend at all. Time to just focus on your mb, and making new friends.
Wait….. if you only just told him you loved him now, did you two ever actually discuss dating?
It doesn't sound like you were a couple.
You need to stop being around this guy.
“Hey, honey. I haven't heard from you in almost 3 days. I understand you're upset, but if we're going to be dealing with issues like this by ignoring each other instead of talking them out, then I don't think we're a good match to be in a relationship anymore. Let me know what you think. If I don't hear back from you by tomorrow morning, I'll operate on the assumption that we are broken up.”
Happens everyday lol I don’t need to send you a link
Because she lied. Had she told the truth, we could’ve both found other people.
I personally wouldn’t be mad if my mom walked in
Or what I’d say “are you seriously POUTING like a child right now?” With a big ol rolleyes.
Yous are coworkers, not even really friends apparently. Don't take it so personal.
I'll keep this in mind moving forward
What?
If the problem is stuff getting in her mouth, have you tried condoms as a compromise?
Oh gotcha!
There’s a lot I can say about a man that wants to plan a destination get-away while his pregnant wife is back at home. A cheater isn’t automatically one of them.
This is some of the worst advice I’ve ever seen on Reddit. Are you the boyfriend?!
somewhere where no one knows them
So literally anywhere? I could go to the grocery store 2 mins from my house right now and not a single person there would know me. This is such a reach
I would throw water on him. ? That's what my parents did if we wouldn't wake up. Solved that issue fast. Since he wants you to play Mommy, maybe try it out.
This IS the way.
Does anyone think this could have been an accident or is my husband just a pig?
It may have been an accident, but he is definitely cheating on you.
It's possible that he didn't intend to send it to her, but he definitely wasn't intending to send it to you.
So either he meant to cheat on you by sending it to your sister, or he meant to cheat on you by sending it to somebody else and accidentally sent it to your sister.
Yeah, sure she only slept on the couch. She already lied to your face about it once. But suddenly her word is sterling ? If she had been out with the friend the way she claimed, and staying over with the friend the way she claimed, she wouldn’t have been at this guy’s house AT ALL. But you’re expected to swallow the story that she went out of her way to go to this guy’s house so she could sleep on the couch?
You did the right thing.
So something similar happened to me, I just told my wife and then next time she went with me to the coffee shop?
First of all don't text him. Truthfully it's only gonna be an issue if you make it, I would just ignore it and if they ask you can either just lie that you're already seeing someone or just say you aren't interested
Obviously get it the next day. You literally want them to think that. You want them to think “oh it was a mistake! She’s not so bad!”
“Hey “name”, this relationship isn't working for me, soooo I'm out”
It is but she doesn’t care about that part. She’s still wanting him to come home so they can have an intimate moment peeing on a stick together.
It shouldn’t matter for the status of your relationship with her. Staying together just because she’s having a baby is a terrible idea; you’ll both end up miserable, and your future (hypothetical) kid will have a bad example of a relationship modeled for them.
You didn't fuck up at all.
Your husband and his colleague wanted to legally cheat on you and her husband. They're both selfish people so it didn't occur to them that you and her husband would also enjoy yourselves. Part of me thinks what turned them on was how uncomfortable they thought they were making the two of you.
They sound like terrible people. You are an amazing person who went above and beyond to make her partner happy. If your husband is upset now, he can deal with it.
we have only been talking for three weeks prior
she admitted in falling in love with me
She fell in love within three weeks?
What would you do in my situation?
RUN!
Sounds like a simple solution
They were on a couch full of clothes that were not neatly put out and I made the mistake of just throwing my towel on the clothes
If it would kill him hopefully he has good insurance. Anyone that says things like that knows they’re being manipulative
It varies. But what’s not normal is for him to tell you “you don’t love me because we aren’t always having sex” that’s manipulative and abusive.
I think the bigger issue here is that you have expressed something he does hurts you, and instead of showing empathy he has told you it doesn’t matter. Regardless of whether or not his family and culture does those things, he’s deciding that his way is right and that if you are hurt by it it’s your own fault and he’s blameless.
That doesn’t sound like a very supportive partner to me.
Two things can be true you know. Just because your mother is nasty towards him doesn’t mean he’s some Angel. If he was diagnosed (TRULY diagnosed by a professional) then read carefully….he’s INCAPABLE of empathy, you’re not some exception.
You say you’ve heard it all before. Why do you think multiple people have told you the same thing? But they’re ALL wrong and YOU’RE right. Sure thing. Good luck, you’re gonna need it unless you wise up.
Like everyone says here OP ur self esteem is dangerously low girl damn. You should really consider all the good u bring because with a mentality like yours you are a prime target for abusers.
Which is where the above comment comes in. You put someone on such a high pedestal and make yourself a little humble servant in awe of how they would even spend a second in ur presence and that's fucking sad.
This man can be:
The sweetest dude in the world honestly and great beyond measure. But do you think he's gonna want to be with someone that thinks of themselves as less than for him if he's that caring? Would be really want to be with someone that keeps comparing herself to him like he's God and the be all and end all and keeps basically judging him for chooooosing! To be with her when she doesn't see it in herself? I had such tanked self esteem when i met my husband and he honestly at some point told me that my doubting myself made him feel like he was taking advantage of me. Because i kept telling him he should probably choose someone better.. that made him feel like i was pushing him away. And at some point you say tht shit enough he will listen and it'll show in the relationship!
Or
He could turn out to be a complete asshat hence the don't put a partner on a pedestal because if he were to start showing toxic behavior traits like being controlling, setting unrealistic boundaries, being physically inappropriate, cheating or just being emotionally or sexually manipulative you would have built him up to be so perfect that you deserve any ill treatment he would give u and u will take it! Because YOU BELIEVE YOU WOULD NEVER BE ABLE TO GET BETTER and would do anything to keep them happy.
your mentality is perfect for thise type of AHs and you'll get hand picked by abusers because they can pick up a weak target from the get go. You seem like you don't like yourself very much so u wldnt stand up for yourself if u ever were pushed enough to be in a situation like that.
You need therapy dude.. and u need to start actually seeing yourself as a human being not a commodity. People are more than what they bring to the table financially or physically. You have a very skewed view on relationships. It doesn't seem healthy at all.
If you're doing that because of preconceived stereotypes you have of them, then it could be racist
Okay well what you described was literally emotionally cheating…? I think if you told your husband word for word the conversation what happened he would be upset. You should have said you had a bf or shut it down. And in front of ur friends too?? Bruh
Okay well what you described was literally emotionally cheating…? I think if you told your husband word for word the conversation what happened he would be upset. You should have said you had a bf or shut it down. And in front of ur friends too?? Bruh
he lacks empathy for other people but he has it toward me.
Nope. She’s seen all the red flags, but she’s ignoring them because he treated her well during their short relationship.
Within 5 years he’ll show his true colors, he’s already starting by yelling at her mom and using his diagnoses as a weapon.. this isn’t a good guy, it’s a guy who’s hidden the worst parts of himself for a year or two. It’s going to get back quick.
There’s a really simple metric I use for whether or not you should stay in a long term relationship. And it’s this:
Overall, is this relationship adding to your life? Is this person adding to your life? Making it better? A net positive? Or is this relationship or person making things worse? Harder? Affecting your mental health in a negative way?
I think you can probably guess what the result is from each option. If they’re adding, stay. If they’re not, it’s time to go. I assume you did your part by trying to support this person and maybe offer some suggestions. I assume you’ve already given them time to work through this themselves.
Sometimes you have to let people sort things out for themselves
Just because of some of the rather vile comments I've gotten, based on what's in this post I notice a lot of people are making some interesting assumptions about how our relationship began, which I didn't mention at any point, I merely provided the information the sub rules demanded I give. If you need clarification on anything to give advice, please ask. I'd rather not have the last 10 years of my life cheapened by half-baked thoughts and cruel comments
Man, show her this thread
I had four impacted wisdoms, had to break the bone on top, swollen like a circle for a few days.
And aside from being driven, i handled myself. I set up a station on the table next to where i lay down and kept my meds, fluids, salted fluids for faintness from not eating as much, and just mooched it on the couch for two days.
You feel hilariously ugly and that at most could be part of why she didn't want to want hers or your bf there. But its so immature because 1. Who cares what they think Youre sick 2. You cannot hold people hostage and guilted because you feel too ugly and pathetic for your bf to see you
May be she is not that much into you anymore.
Am i going to hell for retaliation?
I think a lot of this quite frankly ends up on her and what she wants to do. She obviously deserves empathy for her depression and needing treatment. With that said, if its killed her sex drive and you've talked about it and she needs to make an appointment to ask about this, the best you can do is ask if there's anything you can do to help her make and go to that appointment, at some point if she keeps avoiding it you have to conclude it's not a priority for her.
Apparently, my libido is causing her a sort of performance anxiety that's paradoxically worsened the issue.
So this is concerning. From the sounds of things, you are being patient and allowing her time to work on her treatment. To sort of turn this into a 'the problem is you' moment starts to feel more like excuse making and quite frankly manipulative.
Again, there's no shame in taking the medication and its a given that changes to hormones can affect lots of things. With that said, if you two aren't in agreement on where you want to get to with this it's a big problem. Either she wants a healthy physical relationship with you or she doesn't. Again, no issue if she's not there at the moment, the treatment affects are real, but she has to want to get herself back to that place. If she feels the treatment is more important than eventually returning to a physical relationship then I think again, it's clear fixing this isn't a priority for her.
If it isn't a priority for her I think you have a lot of tough questions to ask yourself. I assume she expects you to be monogamous with her, but what is monogamous if she isn't interested in sex?
Typically in marriage there's two vows, 'To Forsake all others' and 'To Have and to hold'. The first is committing to fidelity, the second is committing to be sexual. Refusing to have sex is just as much of a deal breaker as having an affair and the point is, the two work hand in hand. Asking for one without providing the other is an empty ask.
Again patience, understanding, realizing that you can't always get what you want and you want to support someone through tough times are all important traits but at some point you just have to ask are my needs even a priority here.
Your husband declared to you in no uncertain terms he complicit in his family’s homophobia. He likely ruined his relationship with sister and you. Does he understand this?
Your husband declared to you in no uncertain terms he complicit in his family’s homophobia. He likely ruined his relationship with sister and you. Does he understand this?
Oh honey I’m so sorry this happened. I’ve been there, many of us have been there. Do not stay in contact with him. This man, regardless of what you thought of him before that moment, is not a good man.
This is not your fault. You did nothing wrong. You were violated and you are entitled to every single thing you are feeling right now. If you have it in you, please consider reporting him. If not, at the very least tell people you trust about what happened and make sure everyone in your circle knows he is bad news. This is for your own safety.
'in salvage me'?
Always choose the dog over the boyfriend saying to get rid of the dog
I would be very careful drinking around them now that this all came out!
Definitely get a lawyer. She can’t move the kids across the country without your permission. And child support can’t always be waived by the parents, some states take that into their own hands. So even if she says she won’t make you pay child support, the state could decide otherwise.
I am really curious why this has caused her to want a divorce, and why she wants so badly to move away? There was no infidelity involved and it’s not your fault that this son was hidden from you this entire time. Is it possible the mother of this son is communicating with your wife?? Why did the mother decide to reach out to you now??
I’m sorry this is happening. I hope she realizes the mistake she is making and changes her mind.
He should not guilt trip you into giving him bj’s. You two aren’t compatible, the only options are he either breaks up with you or accepts no bj’s.
You learn from it so in the future you can curb your desires if she (or some potential future partner) is too wrecked to give consent.
I want to believe there's a magic fix and I'll wake up and this never happened 🙁
He sounds selfish and manipulative, unless there's a huge amount to the story that you are not telling us. If he were a decent bf he would have offered to come over and make you dinner after hearing that you worked at 24 hour shift, and then followed that up with a foot rub. I'd say you should let him not speak to you permanently.
Yep. I s stuck and for another 2 years because we'd already been together for 8, and what a waste of time that would make. But by then I'd lost ten years. I was 33 when I finally left, met my husband a little over a year later and here we are!
You learn so much from being in incompatible relationships. You can't see it now, but give yourself a few months after you leave. You'll see it. You'll feel it.
To be honest this happens to me a lot but LOL at the day I have the guts to cheat and use this bullshit as an excuse to make some dude feel bad for me ffs
To be honest this happens to me a lot but LOL at the day I have the guts to cheat and use this bullshit as an excuse to make some dude feel bad for me ffs
It never good to date your boss. End it.
Honey, you do not salvage. You get your car back and recognize that the reason a 26 year old is dating an 18 year old college student is because nobody that is their age would deal with their bullshit, and you’re easy to control. Case in point her taking YOUR car.
Emeshment!
It’s called developing boundaries and realizing people are breaking them. I’m friendly, but if I’m in a relationship and a girl still tries to flirt with me I feel weird about it. You have boundaries around your relationship and when people break them your response is what should happen.
Yep….other “realistic observations” he could have made was telling her how proud he is of all the hot work she did to reach a healthy weight.
If he's behaving that way sometimes, he's capable of behaving that way and the good behavior is him masking. He's telling you he doesn't have his shit together, and the stories he's telling you indicate clearly that he's not capable of managing intense emotions.
Distance yourself and end the relationship.
How to end a relationship 101 ?♂️
I know I have issues with communication but I do not care about communication enough to fix it.
What a stupid position to take.
Seeing how you are not getting back together (thank god)… I'd suggest for you to stop seeing him completely.
You're broken up. You don't need to maintain toxic contact with him.
And in a bit, revisit this thought:
What is the best way for me to analyze my behavior in this relationship to know if I am manipulative?
Obviously there are 2 sides to a story, but given his absurd comment, I am guessing he was the problem, not you.
Ah yes, Reddit strangers. The perfect Therapists.
It won't change. In fact you'll wish you had done it sooner. She doesn't want to change. She likes the way she is. You are not partners.
I have three nieces because of the pullout method, from three different siblings.
Yep. Press charges against your husband . Once that is in motion, contact a divorce lawyer. What he did is unforgivable.
I think you should just tell him you're calling the police if he doesn't give the cat back. But I strongly suggest finding somewhere else for the cat to on-line until you can leave your husband. I'm sure it's the last thing you want to imagine but my thought is he might hurt or kill the cat if you bring it back into the house.
I do feel that the opportunity is past. He's not going to admit it in conversation.
Think about what you saw. How sure about it are you? There was definitely a mark, was there? If there is no mark there next time you see him, then Yes, there is something funny going on. And since marks on necks arent usually something that comes and goes, it is more than likely that it was a hickey.
Think about opportunity and motive too. What opportunity has he had? Is anything about his demeanor different?
The watch in the future. That doesn't mean obsess. That means forewarned is forearmed and you might notice things now that would have otherwise been meaningless or easily overlooked.
You have made several posts over months about this guy. That is not healthy in any capacity. You've gotten useful advice in those months as well. Youre not posting because you want advice or you want to vent. You want someone to tell you exactly what you want to hear.
No you gave him an ultimatum to let you sleep with other people for your relationship to continue. You are torcheri g him and breaking him mentally. Stop being selfish and let him go.
“She never did anything wrong” I assure you she always knew Amanda was touching her a bit to much, but she let it go, just like you did.
Amanda has been preparing her for a long time.
And cheating with a girl or guy at the end of the day is cheating.
Is cutting Amanda an option, I think this would be the only way, to move foward.
Yes but now you are waiting for him. That is what I try to point out with the capital letters!!!!!!!!!!! He is a untrustworthy person stop loosing your time already with him???? Don't be sad about the PAST years don't loose anymore time!!!! He is showing you his true colours.
I'm in Australia too and I'm not one of the ones saying you must be married, but I am of the opinion that you were rushing into things looking to buy a house together so early in your relationship, and you come across as lacking financial literacy.
I think you should speak with a mortgage broker to assess your options for buying property on your own. Also look into investing in shares instead if you choose to delay investing in property until you've been with your boyfriend a few more years.
This sounds like it was written by a bot.
Don’t stay for pets. This man has literally groomed you if you were 16 when you got together and he was freaking 26 ?. If you stay for the pets this man will hold them hostage just to keep you tied to him. No grown ass adult should be going after teenagers. Heck I’m 23f and anything under 21 seems like a whole ass infant to me so that’s just disgusting.
Leave absolutely anyway you can. It’s not as difficult as you’d think to untie yourself from him. Start by separating your money from his and finding a trusted friend to help you come up with an escape plan.
Celebrating their one- year date-iversary isn’t important to her fiancé. Why should it be? They’re about to get married and will have an actual anniversary to celebrate. I’m guessing that your friend doesn’t approve of the bf’s guy-trips anyway, and him scheduling it over their “special day” just adds fuel to her fire.
I'd make it plain. If she wants to trade in a one year relationship to keep talking to a sketchy old predator, but no contact would be my hill to die on for this situation.
I am a dude and I out of habit will place myself between friends and the road or any source of “possible” danger… but because you guys “hanged” out for a long time and he even cancelled an appointment with tbe bros, there is some chemistry there. Since several days have passed, ask him out again and see what happens.
Don't accept being a back up plan.
Omg big yikes. Save yourself while you can by getting far away from this guy
I’ve articulated these thoughts already. We’re still together. She’s just hoping these feelings are just fleeting. My inner Hefner will only be expressed by my own volition.
I'd have a conversation with her. Just let her know you have her best interest in mind, but that having him there would make you worry constantly that he'd do or say something mean to her and that would very much dampen your day.
The last thing you need on your wedding day is to worry about how guests you don't want there will act.
Don't invite anyone to your wedding that you don't like.
Probably gonna start dating the brother and ruin the friendship even further because “she can't help how she feels”
Look maybe it's a weird thing to ask of your friends and OP apparently doesn't see why it's such a big deal but she had her reasons for it! She asked her please don't flirt with my brother.
Now me!! I love my friends. Good friends are hot to find. If my one of my best friend asks me to not do something they are uncomfortable with.
What i hear is step back please there are literally other men here just not my brother not with my friend.
OP hears lemme go spread em ?
Let me guess – they didn’t tolerate this appalling behaviour and left you? You need to increase your emotional intelligence
Make it 0%, King. Stand tall.
She got back to you because she thought she’s losing you. Typical female nature. Tell her to suck it up.
You sound absolutely insufferable. Poor guy.
Mate
I feel for you and am wishing you the best. Glad to see you looking to take care of yourself somewhat here.
That said, feels as if you're (perhaps unintentionally) avoiding the question about exactly how involved religious leaders in the faith community are. Regarding the decision to get married, her treatment plan, and what's best for her.
It's possible that you don't know, I'm not suggesting that you should know everything. Surely you're not at all of her therapy appointments or every conversation, but the nebulous involvement of religious authority figures as she struggles massively with religious issues is a major variable that isn't being addressed meaningfully in your responses to this point.
Its going to be easy AND difficult. Easier because he hasnt seen her so long but difficult if he maintains he wants to stay in contact. The trouble with the “compromise” he suggests is that there is no compromise staying in contact with her is staying in contact with her. Its no different. He's not compromising.
I think I'd try to understand the relationship he has with her in more detail. I'd be honest with him and tell him that from my point of view he's getting intimate pictures and contact with an ex g/f. The money he has paid makes it even worse. So that has to stop. Communications, if there are any after that, need to be above board and non-sexual in nature. No flirting. If he has a platonic relationship with her it needs to begin right now. It would be a good idea to communicate with you about the communications with her.
It doesnt sound like he stays in contact with her very much apart from the sexy stuff so it would be worth while asking him what remains if you take out the suggestive communications? What would he rather have? Her, who appears to be someone he used to know, or you who is here and now?
Its all well and good to tell him what he has to do, but he has to understand what he is doing within himself if he is being inappropriate and disrespectful to his new relationship. I think unfollowing her is a good start but its I don't think he's going to have a “Come to Jesus” moment and realise that he's sabotaging his new relationship. That's going to take time.
Give him a Barbie doll and tell him to dress that up because you’re not a doll. Controlling how you look is a serious red flag….
Because even open relationships have rules. The friend also was not privy to this info either which means he was knowingly trying to do something wrong, rather than a misunderstanding about this couples open relationship guidelines.
Ok so I'm going to go out on a limb and assume that your BF has zero understanding of female anatomy. I had friends who believed that women only had “one hole down there” until their mid 20s. So I would suggest starting with explaining your anatomy. Second, a lot of guys just don't even know what they are supposed to be doing. He might believe that the way to do things is to stick his tongue up there. Find out what he thinks is supposed to be happening on his end to clear up any misconceptions. Finally, at the expense of being graphic, does he know what the clitoris is? If not show him. Tell him what you want him to do Ultimately you have to clear up all of his unknowns and reassure him that he won't be a failure at it. Those are my thoughts anyway.
Record next time you go out. Then playback to HIS parents and friends. Alternatively, you can make it public on your fb account.
You know what needs to be done, do it.
This.