![](/cs/camsoda2500.jpg")
0 views
Press right there to start video or
Room for on-line sex video chat sweetbarbiedoll
Model from: de
Languages: en,de
Birth Date: 2003-11-11
Body Type: bodyTypeAverage
Ethnicity: ethnicityWhite
Hair color:
Eyes color:
Subculture: subcultureHousewives
Date: October 4, 2022
You haven't been gaslighting him, I promise. Gaslighting is a specific thing that people have used too broadly to mean saying anything untrue, intentionally or not. That's not what it is.
Gaslighting is psychologically manipulating someone into doubting their own sanity.
That's not what you did. It requires malicious intent.
What you did is trust doctors and act as you would if what the doctors said was correct.
The fact that lead to you saying untrue things doesn't make you a gaslighter, it makes you an unfortunate victim of substandard medical care.
And now you know the truth, you are changing how you act accordingly.
Buy her ear plugs
I think you responded to the wrong person. I was asking for sources on people being wrongly accused as well.
I mean she is his ex, and she’s accusing him of rape, I think most people would be defensive and enforce distance in that situation?
Then you need to have some serious discussions about that and why he keeps checking out other girls from his past.
Just leave him. Call the cops on him for slitting his wrist then leave him after. My sister’s boyfriend did this to her multiple times to make her stay or whenever she did not show up to his place. It took awhile but she eventually left him. He’s alive and okay now.
A Christian/religious couple in a relationship cannot go out with friends? Wow
Don't get the other comments. It's a shit bag friend move.
Hello /u/ThrowRAtristan,
Your post was removed for the following reason(s):
Your title did not include at least two ages/genders or was not formatted correctly
Posts must:
include details about the involved parties including ages, genders, and length of relationship, and
request advice in real situations involving two or more people
We are enforcing the two rules listed above by making all titles start with ages/genders in the following format:
[##X][##X], [## X][## X], or [##-X][##-X] where ## is the age and X is the gender (currently M, F, T, A, NB, FTM, MTF but more can be added). You can have more than two ages/genders listed, but you must have at least two at the beginning of your title. Here is an example:
[34NB][88-F] We are two people in an example post
Please resubmit with a corrected title.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.
Thank you! I actually will because the man’s not evil at all, I feel he’s just a bit of a hypochondriac?
???bro be for real
Try smoking a lot of weed or taking ketamine so you forget what you learned. Because this is more a “you” problem than a “her” problem.
You're right. Which pretty girl rejected you in high school?
He is middle aged and single, if he cannot get a woman to sleep with him for free in a long run, then he needs to pay for sex sometimes I guess.
He is lucky to catch a young beautiful you now to fill that void, hopefully he stops the paying for sex while dating you.
But just in case, request for him to do STD test. You too.
Trojan thin
Trojan thin
I asked him. It was very awkward. I grew up in a very traditional household where no one really talked about anything like this and so i wasn't sure if it was presumptuous or inappropriate of me to buy them for the first time!
Umm…did you just analogize your marriage with a shit covered bed? Because………
I really appreciate the advice. And I’m taking it to heart. On the whole “bangmaid” thing…. He bought me a sexy maid costume about 1.5 years into dating. And makes jokes about how he has to “punish the maid for not cleaning enough” immediately followed up with “I’m just kidding I’d never expect you to clean the whole place.” I don’t know what his life was like too much growing up as far as chores go but he has mentioned he believes his parents are really messy and he’d “never what to live like that” his Mom is a nurse and keeps good surfaces really clean but there is always cat food and litter on the floor. And the cat water bowl has very hot water stains so bad it looks like hasn’t been touched by a sponge in years. So I don’t know how much of his messy nature is like a generational trauma cycle that has yet to be broken?
Yes I do present female but I identify as NB for clarification.
He often blames being tired or forgetting for not doing much. He is very forgetful. I don’t know how much of that is learned or how much of that is ADHD. We are both on that spectrum. I’m an inattentive daydreamer, he’s the over stereotyped “oh look a dog” kind. Neither of us are medicated.
I’ll include a little update as this literally just happened today. I started getting ready for bed and while he was making dinner he came into the room and initiated a conversation. My short term memory sucks but this is the gist; he specifically got upset about my Mom/child comment because he had an ex that was emotionally abuse and that kind of rhetoric was common ammunition that this ex used against him. I did stand up for myself and said that tho I am sorry my comment made him upset it’s not my responsibility to walk on egg shells around his past that did not involve me. Those feelings and trauma are things he needs to unpack himself and try to find growth from.
He also mentioned that he feels I don’t see the things he does do for me. I have chronic depression, and he does encourage me a lot to get up and take care of myself. He’ll remind me of plans I made and how I’d feel better if I stuck to them rather than bailing out. He’s carried me off the couch and into bed and brought me my makeup wipes after I fell asleep on said couch. I’ll admit I did not see that he was helping me, I have had to help others with depression and the emotional energy spent just trying to get someone out of bed it very draining. Since we moved in, tho I have done all the dishes, he has done most of the laundry and when I got angry about the baskets of clean clothes not put away he dropped everything and helped me organize the closet and dressed. And he is the only one that has taken the trash out of both the bathroom and the kitchen. I make the coffee M-F as I get up before he does but he always makes coffee and even brings me a cup ready on Saturday and Sunday.
We had a long talk about how we feel and how we made each other feel through actions inactions and words. I cried a lot. He admitted he had been dismissive about things and apologized for it, stating that he’d try to do better. He mentioned he was concern that my depression seemed to be getting worse because our physical intimacy has been lacking lately, and I haven’t been delving in my creative hobbies or video games (dead by daylight anyone?) and I have been falling asleep on the couch more and more. He did say he was stressed at work, his bosses keep nitpicking him over the tiniest things, and staff that has been their for longer push their worn off on him as “learning opportunities”. So I can understand from his perspective he needed to come home and be supported and got met with “you said you do these dishes and you didn’t?” Instead made him feel that I wasn’t seeing the things he was doing. And I’ll admit I wasn’t seeing them.
We discussed a plan going forward. We both promised to try to communicate better about needs and energy levels. Like “do you think you have enough energy to do the dishes today when you get home from work? I’d really appreciate if you did. Please let me know if that’s something you can get done today” we are also going to implement a chore chart. To hopefully divide up responsibilities more equally. I know it won’t be perfect and it’ll be a little 60/40 70/30 some times and not completely 50/50.
I just hope I’m not being manipulated and that he actually sticks to improving his cleanliness. I spent a long time explaining how when the home is taken care of it makes me feel cared for and our space respected. But we will have to see. I’ll def post any future updates on my own page.
THIS is what adults do!
What’s gonna happen if she needs a c-section???
I'm so sorry for your loss. But please consider that internet strangers here are more concerned about your wellbeing than your boyfriend… of course it's more than enough reason to end the relationship and I'm so sorry that you're going through this on top of losing your friend. But you have yet another reason, he has been emotionally abusive to you, by calling you names. Consider this: why did he even go to your house after learning that your best friend died? He said it was to keep you company, but he didn't do that and instead he was cruel to you and emotionally kicked you when you were on the literal floor. My cynic mind thinks that he did it ON PURPOSE. That he knew that you would be devastated and he went to your house to devastate you more on purpose. Why? Because people who are emotionally vulnerable are easier to abuse and the more you break the self esteem of a person, the easier further abuse will become. So, yes, you need to lose this man, if you don't he will escalate his emotional abuse (or worse)
Y’all need some help. Please reach out to any resources in your area and don’t be to proud to ask for help. Your lives are a pressure cooker, but being so nasty to your beloved is abusive my friend.
Have you literally tried TALKING to him about it??? By your post, it doesnt sound like you have actually talked to him. Mf what do you think is going to happen if he doesnt get support from you or doesnt have anyone to talk to about it? Nothing good, thats what. You have done nothing (it sounds like) to comfort your 'best friend' or offer him support. Tell him you know, dude. Tell him you dont judge him for staying with her, and for hoping it would get better. Tell him that her cheating doesnt immasculate him or make him weak Tell him he deserves better, tell him she doesnt love him. Tell him that he is worth more and shouldnt let himself be used like this. He isnt at fault, its his partner. She is manipulating him, and taking advantage of him. She doesnt deserve his affection, or anyones for that matter, considering how she abuses it.
Dump her that’s so fucked up and immature. But relax. I’ve had scares with that and have spoken with one of the leading doctors is the HSV field. To catch it from a water bottle would be extremely unlikely. The virus does not survive long on surfaces especially ones that are not warm and damp. There’s a reason it’s typically spread by kissing or sex because it requires a healthy amount of direct exposure to the person with the outbreak to contract it. Even then if he has had the sore for a couple days and it scabbed over that means his shedding is basically super low. If you have any other questions you can message me or looks up Terry Warren and her website has so much info on the topic. As for testing I wouldn’t as it’s not reliable unless you get a western blot test. First outbreaks are the worst so if nothing happens in the next few weeks I’d consider yourself in the clear.
You are 21 years old. Why do you think that you need permission to date a 19 year old girl.
Important yet subtle question: Did she take the ring with her traveling?
…Cause she is only as good as the girl that cheated? It also wasn't “one bad mistake” it was a series of choices over and over again that all basically said you are worthless to her.
It can be overcame, but not if she's gonna keep being a selfish child about it.
You have a good relationship because she doesn’t know that you are cheating, that doesn’t sound like a good relationship. If you had one you wouldn’t cheat on your poor gf. You are in contact with your ex and talk about „how good your relationship were“ why don’t you just cut her off? Or just be with her and leave your gf alone
Be frank. You don't need to tell her she was a monster but you can tell her she was a completely different person last time and you cannot risk enduring that again because your marriage almost didn't last through it last time if it wasn't for the fact that her old personality came back. She won't like that, and it may make her feel insecure, but it's important she knows how serious you are about this.
He kept going after you had indicated you weren’t interested?
Not sure why you feel like you did anything wrong
Yeah there's a big difference between someone not desiring to have sex often and not being able to have sex often due to life circumstance.
she had sex with someone else bro, sorry
Maybe because she has had to deal with people talking about her for a long time and knows how to cope. You should learn how to cope by going to therapy. She's 29 and looks 15. I'm sure she has her own personal issues that she has to deal with because of that. Go. To. Therapy. And put your daughter in therapy too while you're at it.
Yes! Yes she does. Super upsetting the way she speaks of her BF, like he's not a person and less than because he is just “A Black American”. She just wants someone with $ who will pay her parents off. Sad
Go to court
What's a micro cheat like just the tip?
This is how I read it: when her partner asked to go further than kissing and touching, she said no. He then proceeded to massage OP, and OP again said that she won’t go further than that. He then stops and leaves.
That to me said that he tried again with a massage, after OP said no the first time. OP also wrote “he put it away” which to me says that he whipped it out, but I could be completely wrong.
I'd think that was good concealer well used if I hadn't noticed it till I found the container.
Tell her. Shouldn't matter and if it does, she's not the right one.
You dodged a bullet. Someone who would leave you for how your parents acted in this instance doesn't understand how adult relationships work, and is self-centered, besides… either that, or it was an excuse they gave to cover up the real reason they left you, be it cheating or something else. If they really loved you, they would not have left you, simple as that.
You'll heal from this, and you'll find someone who will be better for you than your ex here ever was.
If she won’t spend time alone with you, even virtually. it’s probably not what you’re hoping it is.
Oh please she is not fucked for life. But she should absolutely dump this asshat.
This is where you hit the “Fuck, go back” button. You had it right the first time. And yes, this will haunt you forever. Rightfully so too.
He has said that he is afraid I’m going to leave him. But to elaborate as well, he has an ongoing custody battle with his ex, who appears to be on a mission to ruin his life (called cops on him several times, for no solid reason) , he has no plans to marry me, unless i sign a cohab agreement or prenup and i have had to make painful sacrifices for him. So yes, one foot out the door might be true but ive been constantly compromising for him. ( i know, i shouldnt have gotten pregnant)
Love is always conditional. It is as simple as that.
it seems like everyone is in agreeance about not doing his roommates laundry- thanks for telling me before I did! and awww we actually are in college still and live in student housing so I have a roommate in my room too- he just invites me to stay all the time!
I look at this differently. What if you improved but then had a child that was not able to travel due to health issues? Would he nope out of being a parent then too? Because there are a lot of factors with kids that could make travel difficult. Otherwise, it is not your fault your situation changed. I LOVE travelling. I have lived in over a dozen different places, and love visiting new places. But my husband isn't into it, and his job is specific to the city we are in. So I haven't moved in over 13 years, but I still go on trips on my own or with friends. He has gone on one or two, but it just isn't his thing. It is the best of both worlds for us. It sounds like you are doing the work to improve things, but he isn't willing to work through this on his side too. Every person in a relationship changes, often quite significantly. Circumstances can change overnight. It is being willing to work TOGETHER that makes a solid relationship.
The reason getting back with exes largely fails as well as why people give advice to not pursue those situations is because there's a reason the relationship ended. In saying that, the relationship could only logically work if that issue was addressed. The problem is that exes usually reconnect out of loneliness or just focusing entirely on the positives. They get back together, the issue that caused their breakup creeps back up and it fails.
So you're here saying you just broke up. Reason being you projected your insecurities onto him due to past trauma and mental health issues. You're now taking steps to address these issues, which is great! Congratulations. You do, however, have more to do, and need additional resources.
So is the damage irreparable? We can't possibly know. Only you can know based on how things ended. I believe you can have a healthy relationship so long as your issues are legitimately managed. Can you win him back? Focus on fixing your issues and cross that bridge when you get to it. Again, we can't know. He may have decided how he feels forever. He may also accept what you tell him and give it a shot. But right now that's not what you should be focusing on. Assume he's gone. You're getting better for YOU, not him or anyone else. Good luck.
tbh sometimes I'm worried too. what sickness is going on in his mind to make him act like this and what more is there ? I shudder even sensing him around me because I keep thinking what sick thoughts are you having right now?
You can tell how selfish she is based on the fact she thinks her fiancé is worried she’s going their to party. He’s clearly worried about her safety and people who live there or from Mexico say it’s a dangerous place.
I believe I broke their trust in me by just hanging out with my co worker and taking my time to find myself and not giving the attention I used to do
You should tell your boyfriend. Relationships are built on trust and honesty. You need to be honest with him, and trust he will not make it awkward.
How will you explain it to your boyfriend he finds out your room mate confessed his feelings to you and you kept it a secret from him? You can't guarantee your roommate doesn't remember or will not say anything in future.
Be loyal to your boyfriend, not the room mate (unless you want to ditch the boyfriend and get with the room mate).
That last comment was a deal breaker. It doesn’t matter if his comment was suppose to explain he’s a nice guy and didn’t force you. It’s creepy, it’s alarming. I wouldn’t keep going out with him.
I think this girl is sneaky af and agree with everything you said until the ex’s can not possibly be friends. My first husband sends me food surprises and mocha frappes through door dash just because he can so let’s not bring that negativity here to me.. lol. I love frappes! We have been divorced for 33 years, I’ve been remarried for 33 and he’s been married several times but the most recent wife is 20 years. I 100% agree with your last sentence.
I know but it takes two to tango, especially if you knew he was taken
For me thats a boundary I never crossed and dont plan on doing is all.
You get both of you into individual therapy
What I'm getting from this is that you're in the mindset of now your self esteem has been nurtured and built up by your boyfriend, you now believe you can seek better options.
I'd leave, you don't have to have any reason to leave a relationship and if you're not happy, you're not happy. But I think this guy deserves someone who is committed to him fully and not considering how they always could have done better.
It's fine being friend with your exes when there's no hangups. The fact she was worried about telling him she was with you means that, at the very least, he still has feelings for her. That's not a true friendship, that's vexed love.
If that's bothering you, I think you should talk to her about it. She can be friend with anyone, but if her ex hasn't gotten over their break up, he has vested interests to make your relationship fails, or at least makes her feels miserable about it. That's something she can't tolerate from him and you need to be able to trust her that she will actually treat him as a friend and shot him down if he ever step out of line, even if it means cutting him off he continues to disrespect the boundaries of your relationship.
All I thought at this was a G.I. Joe with a Kung-Fu grip. Lol
Unfortunately my love language is touch or emotional. Doesn’t have to be sexual in any way shape or form. I have reassured her I wouldn’t even try to hold her hand if it meant I could just spend some time with her… whether alone or in a group if that made her more comfortable. I offered to go running or go to the gym with her and she explained that is her personal get away. So I understand and won’t force it. I offered to go hiking or to go to the park since she loves nature, and she keeps saying that she’s busy. I know she’s afraid to completely open up due to her past relationships, and I would never force it. Just any communication or help would be greatly appreciated from my end.
I feel like it’s a strange concept all together sometimes, with him things have felt very different, there’s no butterflies or nervy feelings, there’s only ever been calmness and a settled feeling. I feel like this could be a communication issue as well, when we first started dating we both said we were looking for commitment and relationships, so I’m thinking that he may be taking things slower. This has however been one of the most healthy relationships I’ve been in, we help eachother out with work things as well, and he always says I can tell him anything, he finds ways to include me in things and took charge when I had a medical emergency and couldn’t sort myself out. I think there’s just a lot of expectations put on relationships “it should be made official by this amount of weeks etc..” and although it shouldn’t it just gets in my head, Thankyou
It’s not bitching, it’s providing context and asking for advice.
It’s not very hot to understand that I lock it when we leave, and don’t when we use the restroom. Do you know anyone who locks their room to step out for a minute?
Any common household wouldn’t have to do that, and it’s looking like I’ll have to and I accept that.
But I don’t know what you’re calling childish here.
You do know there’s women out there who look just like you that can support themselves right?
maybe telling him that you wouldnt be the first one to say I love you could have changed him in a way ?
i know i wouldnt appreciate hearing that and would stunt how we’d move forward in the relationship. i would hate to know that because of her past experiences my SO is refraining from telling me she loves me. sounds almost like saying the phrase would be admitting defeat in a way
i would speak to him and find out where the problem lies, and i wish you the best as i can’t possibly comprehend how youre feeling right now
Yeah its def a bit of a self esteem issue on his end. People with personality disorders tend to attract people who let them cross boundaries. I’m guessing its his first gf?
I would lay it out for him and make him try to see where the relationship is heading. I assure you in 1 year from how he's gonna be wondering how he got involved in such a toxic relationship and regret he didn't leave earlier.
I was lucky I had a a good friend group who sat me down and told me I had to leave this girl. I would try and do the same for your brother. Encourage him to hang out with you more, maybe introduce him to other girls etc to inspire some self confidence. People like her will leave you a shell of your former self, very dangerous individuals. Closest thing to pure evil i have ever come across.
Ah man. Women have aches and pains from all sorts of different issues that aren't as common for men. We also store and use fat differently than men for our reproductive health. Don't rely on Google.
I'm so sorry to say this but the truth is that you don't have a boyfriend. You have a man around that sees you as a body to have sex with and nothing more. He's not interested in you as a person. He does nothing for you. He YELLS at you (hell no, that's emotional abuse). He doesn't do nice things for you. Nothing. For him you're just the sex machine, not a person. Dump him, you can do better.
I feel like the purpose of my messaged was missed. I have handled the adult responsibility side. The emotional side is the issue.
It’s a fair question though. She has to coddle him and make sure he feels appreciated while she does… literally everything else? That’s not deserved praise at a point. If you sit around waiting for your partner to tell you what to do/when to do it, and wait for a reward to even do it, that’s no longer a partnership.
That sounds annoying but has become something she thinks you’re ok with.
If she doesn’t get sick that often, I’d suck it up and just wait for her to get better.
If she does, you’re going to have to hurt her feelings and that’s ok: “I’m sorry you don’t feel good, babe. I need to tell you something a bit uncomfortable, can I do that? (Ok….) We’ve developed a habit when you’re ill where we sit near each other, and every few minutes you say my name, I stop working to give you my attention, and you say “I’m sick.” There’s nothing wrong with that, but I need to ask for a change. I want to be there for you, but I notice I’m starting to resent the interruptions. Could we work on a different habit?”
If she takes it well and changes, great.
If not, you’ll need to start calmly answering with, “Babe, you’re interrupting me again. Please stop interpreting so often to say I’m sick.” and let her figure out something else to do. If it stops working at giving her comfort, eventually she’ll stop doing it.
Well said
You should never love anyone more than your mom, that's normal