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Date: October 9, 2022
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wat do u mean? games.
>Why was he so insistent on keeping these things private?
You yourself said he's never let you use them during the entire tenure of your relationship. The guy obviously values his privacy and independence. It doesn't matter if you think the reason is good enough – the reason is *his.*
I am very protective of my privacy as well. I have my stuff, and it's *my* stuff. Healthy relationships can often involve drawing hard lines in order to keep some sense of self. It sometimes seems silly to us that a person has drawn a line where they have, but the whole point is that they've said “this is mine and I need you to respect that.”
And you didn't. You decided that you needed to know more than he needed to have his space respected.
I don't know the particulars of your relationship otherwise, so who knows, maybe this *is* wildly out of character and there were good reasons to be suspicious. But believe it or not, sometimes people just want to have something that's entirely theirs and not *have* to share it; relationships can see you giving away all kinds of things that are normally reserved for you, and it can get really frustrating to feel like you have no space to call your own.
Lots of commenters are leading you to believe he has some clandestine operation going on, but the odds are it's simpler than that, and I suggest you actually talk to him about it and maybe work on your willingness to actually let people have their space.
I don’t think you can stop this from happening. The problem might not be as simple as him wanting to find friends. You’re both in a completely different life stage than you were when you got together. Buying the house may have made him realize that the life you have isn’t the life he wants. Unfortunately, you’re not guaranteed to grow together as a couple. Sometimes you outgrow your relationship without realizing it.