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  1. No it's not. I can have a month or two (e.g. nude summers / lots of birthdays / festivals or whatever) where we're out every night at pubs or in the garden drinking every day. Then we can go for months without anything. Yes I probably drink too much occasionally but then some people eat too much fast food. The fact is I'm not dependent on it because I can also go without it because I often do. People throw around the term alcoholic too much. Alcoholism is a disease which destroys lives and that is not the same thing at all.

  2. Can you pinpoint actions? Things that your partner has done, that show a lack of care or respect for you? If so, you need to talk about these actions and explain to her how you expect her to change.

    If your partner isn't doing anything to make you upset, you need to look inward and ask yourself why you feel so insecure. I don't know what to advise, beyond that, since it all depends on why you're gripped by negative thoughts about your relationship. It could be some kind of undiagnosed anxiety or depression.

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